Baby Brock

A beautiful day in the neighborhood...

2009-11-07T16:09:00.000-08:00

What a beautiful day! We packed the kids up and headed west to the southern unit of the Kettle Moraine--- a great little 1.5 hiking loop--- perfect for our little munchkins!

I hope I remember...

2009-08-14T19:09:00.000-07:00

I used to pride myself on having a sharp memory. I made my way through the ridiculous series of 'generals' in college simply because I could memorize useless information. There was a time I could name every customer (and their favorite drink) at the Bear Trap....even if they only visited twice a summer. I could nail the names of all 22 students in my class in about 15 minutes on the first day of school (it's a little tougher as a principal when there are 470 of them!). But there are times now.... where I wonder where half of my brain went (my mom claims that's what happens when you have children-- they suck the brains right out of you).

I think about writing often, to help preserve my memories, but can't seem to make enough time in my day to accomplish all I aspire to do.

As I was putting Madi to bed tonight I laid there alongside her for awhile and thought about some of the highlights of the day and week.... and I wondered how I am ever going to remember all I want to tell her someday.

I hope I remember to tell her that she has much more patience when she has had enough sleep.

I hope I remember to tell her that she used to refuse to go to bed at night unless she had her 5 favorite blankets, Elmo, Ernie and a Little People figurine that she calls baby (he's actually a grown man dressed like a mailman). She'll never know how worried I was when I couldn't find her 'friends' this afternoon... after tearing the house and every toy bin apart, I spent about 30 minutes trying to find a website that sells 3 inch plastic Elmo & Ernie dolls (that came in an Easter egg last year)... only to have her disappear for 2 minutes and reappear with all 3 friends in hand (thank God for secret hiding spots!).

I hope I remember to tell her that she sang Happy 33rd Birthday to her Dadda in the sweetest 2 year old voice we've ever heard... we actually sang it twice to make sure one whole version was on videotape!

I hope I remember to tell her about how we would go to the grocery store and she would try to point to and name every single thing we passed... bananas...apples...tomatoes...watermelon...pizza...cake... and how excited she was when she figured out that you can open the doors in the frozen food section!

I hope I remember to tell her how much she loved to be kissed on the forehead... sometimes a hundred times a day!

I hope I remember to tell her that she loved to pick flowers... especially up north at the lake.... and she counted each petal as she plucked them off! Daisies were her favorite!

I hope I remember to tell her that we used to have a special call (almost like a bird) that meant it was time to go upstairs for the night... it was our secret language when she couldn't understand 'upstairs' yet.

I hope I remember to tell her how much I love to see her smiling face in the morning... the messier the hair the better! My favorite part is when she drags all 5 of her blanket (and her 3 friends) into our room to snuggle and slowly wake up together.

I hope I remember to tell her that her brother has been crazy about her since the day he was born. Tucker's favorite thing to do each day is watch her play and dance and talk.... he can't get enough of her! I hope someday soon she realizes that he's a best friend waiting to happen!

I hope someday I remember to tell her that one of her favorite things to do was lick the back of foam alphabet letters and stick them on everyone's face!

I hope I remember to tell them both how very blessed I feel to be their mother...

A Few of My Favorite Things...

2008-09-16T20:20:00.000-07:00

Hanging out with dad when I'm all dressed up (mom did my hair)!

Eating snacks on the boat while we're driving through the channels of Lake Camelot!

Swinging at the park by my house... I could swing all day!

Surprise!

2008-06-11T19:16:00.001-07:00

I bet you can hardly believe it-- a new posting! We are actually still living and breathing and stopping every once and a while to capture Madison milestones. This is her 'shocked' look... so I thought it would be perfect for a new post.

It's amazing I don't take the time to blog anymore, because so much of my life actually depends on other people's blogs. I have a somewhat demented routine of scanning through every blog I know before I actually do any work at night on the computer. I'm certain it's simply my brain's way of procrastinating to avoid things that must be done. I even click on some blogs that haven't been updated for over a year... with the faint hope that maybe today is the day. If only I spent this useless time adding to my own!

Life with Madison is flying by.... she finally started to crawl (at almost 11 months... her own sweet time)... and now she's 'cruising' around the furniture and tables (that's the new parent lingo for walking, but hanging on for support). Madison is still the master of the household (I wonder if that will ever change). She laughs and smiles and loves to copy us (especially with tooth brushing-- she loves to copy mom!). She can't stand when people try to help her do something... she must discover how to do it on her own (I can't imagine where that trait comes from). She is working on tooth #10 (even one of her molars came in!) and she loves to eat fruit, chicken noodle anything, and cool whip. Madison continues to be mesmerized by Elmo and will stop and drop everything if she so much as hears his voice!

I somehow survived my first year as principal... and I've only searched for a new job once this past year. Tomorrow is our last official day of school with children. I continue to learn a great deal about my own set of morals and values... as they are constantly challenged. I have also developed the ability to have absolutely no empathy or caring for adults and their personal issues. I've built up an incredible tolerance to detach myself emotionally to situations.... a teacher's throwing up in their classroom, 'oh well... suck it up... we can't get a sub today'. You were in a car accident 2 months ago and your back still hurts... 'oh well... here's some duck tape and an extension cord for your heating pad.' You were up all night because your ex-lover was banging on your door, then followed you to work and you just called 911..... 'sucks to be you, I'll make sure we keep an extra eye on front door security today.... and let me know if you want someone to walk you to your car after your done teaching today.'.... and those are some of my more positive responses :)

Well, princess Madison has just rolled into my back and is requiring some mush time with her mamma.... because yes... she still sleeps in bed with us. It's on one of my 'to do' lists... move Madison into her own sleeping space... so I can have mine back before Baby #2 arrives (at least for a week or 2). But, it obviously isn't too high on the list, because she is 13 months old tomorrow! And in a few years, I'm sure I'll be wishing for the comfort and security of knowing exactly where our little princess is...

Spring Break 2008

2008-03-22T17:20:00.000-07:00

Madison's first cross country road trip! We left a day early to avoid the March blizzard in Milwaukee (they were predicting 10-15 inches on Saturday). We made a last minute decision to leave Thursday night after bath time instead of Friday morning. So we bundled Maddie up in her jammies and blanket and headed west. Our goal was to get south and west of the storm... and then play it by ear. Jim and Jamie weren't expecting us until Saturday for dinner.... instead we arrived Friday for lunch! We drove straight through and Madison slept the whole time! There were quick little stops for a diaper change, breakfast, or a break in the 60' Colorado sun!

Madison discovered grass today! She would pick up one piece at a time and examined it (until dad showed her how to pull up a whole bunch and throw it in the air). By the end of our break, Madison had thatched about 9 square feet!

We all caught up on sleep when we arrived about 2pm.... showered.... cooked stakes on the grill... and slept like logs. It was off to Boulder today to hippie watch and shop!

1...2...3... Tickle!

2008-03-16T19:51:00.000-07:00

There is nothing cuter than a Madison squeal... thought we'd share one with you!

Camera Happy

2008-03-16T19:31:00.000-07:00

We had a lazy Saturday afternoon (after a full morning of shopping). Madison was getting a little fussy, mostly because she was ready for her afternoon snooze. Just as she was about to fuss a little more, and nuzzle her head into mom's shoulder... she noticed dad in the background with a camera. Amazing how our little wiggle worm's face turned to smiles for the camera!

Our little chick...

2008-03-16T06:55:00.000-07:00

Madison is having fun dressing up as our little chick for the Easter season. We've tried spring dresses, bunny ears, and easter basket photos... but her favorite is naked with a little puff on the top of her head (let's hope this phase doesn't last long).

We are planning and packing for a trip to Denver-land to visit Jim and Jamie over the spring break. It will be Madison's first real road trip. We've decided to split the trip up and stay in a hotel... not quite sure Madison can do all 15 hours at once. Nanna is driving with us, so we'll rotate between driving, hanging out with Madison, and reading trashy magazines (nothing work related allowed). We're going shopping again today to buy a portable dvd player and seasame street dvd's. Madison absolutely adores Elmo, Bert, Ernie, Big Bird, Grover, and the Grouch. She'll sit on the carpet and smile and laugh through the whole show-- it's priceless! Her favorite is when Mr.Noodle dances and acts silly (it probably reminds her of dad).

We're still working on crawling. She's been up on all 4's and rocking since about Thanksgiving... but still not to the crazy crawling yet. She can easily get herself around by rolling, rocking, scooting backwards, pushing across the hardwood floors, etc.. it's just not the traditional crawling you might expect. Just like the day she was born... I think she'll be one to do things when she's ready... regardless of what her friends are doing... or what the book says....(again, let's hope this phase doesn't last long).

I took my first work trip last week. Fourteen of us went to Denver for the Expeditionary Learning National Conference. We had a blast! It was tough to be away from Madison, but I knew she was in good hands with dad. And dad's confidence sure has grown! He can do morning to night routine.... 5 days in a row... and still survive!

I've also recently passed another milestone in life as we now know it, I've finished my Masters in Educational Leadership program-- yahoo! No more Thursday night classes and Monday night study groups! I"m officially done with the graduate school portion of my life.... and will do everything in my power to stay away for a few years... (I know it sounds sick, but I am a little addicted to school).

I can picture it now...

2008-01-14T19:39:00.000-08:00

I can picture it now... 10 years from now Madison will have the same face at one point or another when she doesn't get her way. It's the official 'pout' face for our little cutie. It's amazing to think that there will ever be a day when she doesn't actually get her way seeing as now we pretty much live and breath the 'Madison Way'.

She's growing faster then we can photograph lately. Every time we turn around there's a new change, face, sound, or movement. Her latest thrill is to dance. That's right, she has officially inherited her parents rhythm (you should be laughing right now, especially if you've seen us dance before). She moves her body back and forth every time she hears music and you say, 'dance, dance'.

Madison has also taken a particular liking to Brady.... who licks her every chance he gets!

The cat is also enthralled with Madison... Kitty has finally realized that next to Madison is the place to be if you want attention in this house!

My Little Angel

2007-12-28T20:46:00.001-08:00

My Crib...

2007-12-28T20:17:00.000-08:00

Madison has, hands down, the coolest crib I have ever seen. It's quite unique in the fact that it's round. I saw it while browsing baby rooms online, and I had to have it! Grandpa Bill and Peg gave it to us as a shower present, and we've been in love with it ever since. There's only one problem.... Madison hasn't slept in it yet.

Don't get me wrong, Madison LOVES her crib! She plays in it at least twice a day, reading books, kicking the player piano, watching the fish bobble up and down.... she loves it!

So yes, Jason and I are still welcoming Madison into the 'family bed'. And yes, we still get the 'face' every single time we tell someone that Madison sleeps with us. The 'face' (as Jason calls it) is that disappointed, disapproving, 'oh my god, you do' face... the one with raised eyebrows that quickly scans the room to find others making the same face so they can share in the 'oh my god' reaction. We actually find it quite amusing at this point.

Isn't it all just a crap shoot in the end anyway? I mean really.... if there was an absolute prescribed method of parenting that created the next best thing to Jesus... wouldn't everyone be doing it? Instead, we all do what we 'think' is right and what we 'feel' will make a difference based on the books and web alerts that we are continually bombarded with as new parents... and then we brag about it in 20 years if it works... insisting that our parenting methods were superior to all others!

But in the meantime, we'll just continue with our peaceful, snuggly night, with our snugglebug right in the middle of us (the middle 4 feet to be exact)! And hopefully brag about our decision 20 years from now....

Boo!

2007-12-28T19:56:00.000-08:00

So, what first-time mom isn't a little behind? It's amazing how many people I ran into over the holidays that just LOVED the christmas photo card I sent them. It took about 4 people before I realized that they were referring to the Halloween card that I just sent out in November. I reassured them that their Holiday cards would be arriving right on 'new-mom' time, sometime in February!

Yes, I have a little catching up to do.... I'll begin with Halloween. My little snugglebug was, by far, the cutest thing around! I couldn't decide on one perfect 'first Halloween' outfit, so I bought 6! They were a steal at Old Navy (and coming from a psycho costume sewer--- there is no way I could've made these costumes for less than I bought them for!).

911

2007-10-19T20:01:00.000-07:00

I got a call from mom today while I was at work. It's the first time she's ever called me during the day. Of course, I imagined the worst... Madison's had an accident and Nanna's already called 911....

It was an emergency, and absolutely warented a phone call to interupt my day... because Madison has a tooth! That's right! One of her bottom teeth has emerged into the world of little miss drooly!

Letters from a principal...

2007-10-19T18:52:00.000-07:00

I started a new class last week... School Law... of course I entered with a million questions for the professor. Is the school liable when one of our students throws a rock through a school bus window and injurs someone? Can you fine a 10 year old for repeatedly pulling the fire alarm? What happens when a teacher is hit trying to break up a fight? How bad should the fight be before the cops are called? But, instead of spending the 2nd night of class firing off my questions for the professor, I spent the entire 4 hours thinking about the one he had asked me.

What do you aspire to be?

Throughout life I have set a number of goals and milestones... aspirations. I wanted to find prince charming (a.k.a. Jason), then I wanted to finish my teaching degree... next was working with urban children... live upstairs from a bar or store on a 'hip' street...buy a house...have the most beautiful baby in the world (a.k.a. durdee durdee)... finish my masters degree.... finish a second masters degree (okay, maybe it wasn't in the original plan, but....).... complete a doctorate degree...be a principal..

What do I aspire to be? That is one of the toughest questions I've had to answer in quite some time. What's next? Do I want to be an executive director of a school (or superindendent)? Do I want to be a college professor (not sure if I could handle being around adults all day)? Travel agent? Realator? Starbucks barista?

There's this strange sense of working towards where you wanted to be, and all of a sudden your there and your stuck wondering where you should really be. This must be what a rock star feels like. They spend half of their life hoping to 'make it big' and then when they finally do, they totally loose all sense of direction and control....

No worries about me losing control... I haven't even stayed up past 10pm in the last year and a half!

In my deliberations, one of my fleeting thoughts is to write a book... and I will title it 'Letters from a Principal'... and I will make millions of dollars sharing my plight with other rookie principals around the country.... I will begin with today, a day I won't soon forget.

I turned up the radio as I got into the Malibu this morning. Just in time to hear the end of a newscast I've heard a hundred times before... 'there were 5 shootings around the city last night.... 2 are dead... 3 are injured... one of which is a 13 year old girl... the shootings were at 26th and Hadley...' Immediately I search through the roladex of families (in my mind) that live in that neighborhood, wondering if today will be the day it will strike too close to home.

The call came to Mr.Lowe about 9am this morning, the mother of the 13 year old who had been shot. She's one of ours. A seventh grader. The shot was to her back, spinal cord, they fear she is paralyzed.

To sit, as a leader, amongst 45 adults who have just heard this news... is a moment I will never forget. I had a pile of papers in my hand, ready to lead the professional development for the day, and instead I was instantly speechless. I think I was in shock. Her classroom teacher immediately started crying while the teacher of her older brother filled with rage and frustration. Then there was random chattering about how we could have the kids journal about their feelings.... while others just sat in silence. Most were looking for direction, most were looking at me. I would like to say I came up with the perfect words of comfort, that everything would be okay.... but no one needed to hear that crap.

The word crap is truely an understatement for how I really feel. I work with nearly 60 professionals that have dedicated their passion, energy, expertise, knowledge, and life to helping a community that most others won't even drive through. We spend nearly every moment of the day wondering and worrying about how we can help create a vision to succeed in these students. What is the motivation for a child to succeed if their chances of being shot outweigh their chances of graduating from high school?

Mom, really.... I'm naked!

2007-10-08T19:51:00.000-07:00

A Sneak Peak for Halloween...

2007-10-08T19:50:00.000-07:00

Brady's Back-up

2007-10-08T19:42:00.000-07:00

Madison has learned how to grab. Not just light, playful little cute grabs.... but rip out half the hair on your head grabs. Therefore we let her practice her petting skills on the 'stuffed' version of Brady vs. the real thing. Actually, I think Brady would just give us a pouty face if Madison tried to rip his hair out....

Now Kitty is another story...

Blogging...

2007-10-08T19:26:00.000-07:00

So, there used to be a time (it seems forever ago!) that I would love nothing else than to snuggle up in squishies on the couch and surf the internet or blog. My how times have changed!

First of all, there is no such thing as snuggle time with my computer anymore. As a principal, I spend more time than I could ever imagine responding to emails, writing letters, proofreading reports, etc... most days I would be more than happy to leave my computer in my office (secretly hoping someone would steal it). And my nightly routine of squishes is now a superman-like transformation of whatever work clothes I have on-- with whatever cotton stretchy things are closest to the toliet (as I now only change clothes while doing something else... motherhood has made me the queen of multi-tasking). And as far as the 'couch' goes. The animals have taken over the first floor of our house (including the couches). And the only 'couch' time we get now is for feeding Madison right before she falls asleep at night.

It's amazing how motherhood has changed my perspective and management of time and tasks. I used to actually clean the house regularly and take the garbage out and organize our bills and mail and put my clothes away... and now... I drop everything to hang out with Jason and Madison. It's not that I prefer to live in slop, just that I need those smiles and cooos and giggles more than ever before! I am continually reminded that there is no job more important in this world than being a parent. Not to say your job's not important if you've chosen not to be a parent.... just that when you have the oppotunity to weigh the 2, being a mom comes second to nothing. Her smile lights up the ugliest day. Jason and I compete for the stage when we get home at night to see whose day Madison can brighten first.

We truely are blessed to have such a healthy, happy cutie-- patootie!

Durdee Durdee

2007-09-15T18:41:00.000-07:00

Jason has been calling Madison 'Durdee Durdee' since she was about 1 week old. It immerged during one of the endless nights of singing, dancing, and baby talking Madison into being calm.... and now it's her signal that daddy is home!

We can't take enough pictures of the little stink-pot (as uncle gary calls her). She is too cute! I can't even begin to count how many times Jason and I say that to each other each day....'isn't she cute'....'yeah, she's totally cute'.... there isn't a minute that passes that we don't recognize how truely blessed we are to have our little 'Durdee Durdee'.

It is getting a little tougher as she grows because she is getting sleepier and going to sleep earlier and earlier. Lately she's done at about 7:30pm... and that's not enough awake time with mommy and daddy after they work all day. So we've been trying to fit in extra walks and snuggle time on the weekend.

It's amazing to think she's just over 4 months now! Wow how time has flown! She smiles all the time and is beginning to giggle when you tickle her neck or blow on her tummy. She also drools like crazy so we have to constantly keep changing her bib. She talks in loud, high pitch coos and oohs and aahhhs... and her face expressions are to die for! She can hold a whole conversation with you just with her eyebrows. Her hair is thickening and is an even fuzz all over her head (still pretty sandy blond in color). She has much more control of her arms and hands.... so there is less punching herself in the face happening latey! She still sleeps in bed with us (on her belly most of the time).... at this point I think it's going to be Jason and I finding another bed (versus Madison transitioning to her crib)....

We spent the day shopping in Cedarburg today for the Wine and Harvest Festival, it was wonderful! There were at least 100 booths down the main street (which was closed to traffic). Madison did a fabulous job hanging out in her stroller and giving mom, nanna, and aunt Eileen time to shop and snack... what fun!

Rainforest Jumparoo

2007-08-22T08:39:00.000-07:00

We have found the perfect tool for Madison to work off some of that 'thigh chub'... the Rainforest Jumparoo! She turns into one wild child anytime she even gets near the jumparoo! Her face lights up as you set her down into the seat, because she knows exactly what's coming next. Mom and dad would have bought this weeks ago if they knew what fun it would be!

Somebody loves Elmo!

2007-08-20T19:06:00.000-07:00

Now I understand. I understand Elmo puppets, Elmo dolls, Elmo figurines, Elmo clothes, Elmo books, Elmo movies...etc Babies loooove Elmo! Madison is absolutely infactuated with Elmo, especially his eyes. Just a glimpse of Elmo from across the room and Madison will start grinning!

We found an Elmo puppet book, and it was love at first sight! We've also had the wonderful opportunity of practicing our singing skills to, 'If you're happy and you know it clap your hands'.... and the longer we sing the song, the more creative it gets. Thank goodness she has no idea what we're saying yet!

Madison is 13 weeks old!

2007-08-20T18:53:00.000-07:00

Madison found her foot today! She was sitting on the bed with dad and couldn't help but notice the cute little 'stinky foot' that was sticking out at her. And I'm actually not kidding when I say that Madison has stinky feet! It's the craziest thing, her feet actually get sweaty, clammy and STINKY!

So, to help with her stinky feet, we give her a bath every night. We start the bath routine at about 9pm and keep her up as long as possible. It she makes it until 10pm, it's going to be a great night of sleep for all! Madison regularly sleeps for about 9 hours at a time... from about 10pm until somewhere in the 7am hour... it's wonderful! She's still in bed with us, we seem to be having seperation anxiety issues... it's much easier to just keep our snugglebug right in bed with us!

We went up north again last weekend. It was so cold that Madison actually got to try on one of her little hats! What a cutie! She also loves to snuggle with her bunny. When you squeeze the foot it chirps like a little chick and says, 'somebunny loves you'. She smiles every time she hears it!

Madison and her Bumbo!

2007-07-15T20:31:00.000-07:00

The most amazing chair ever... the Bumbo! She is such a little character in her new chair!

Madison's first 4th of July!

2007-07-15T20:18:00.000-07:00

Well, it's official... Madison loves the northwoods! We gathered up the courage to venture to the northwoods again over the 4th of July holiday and it was wonderful! She slept through the nights, hung out a little by the pier, had endless rides on the porch swing, and gave mom and dad a chance to have pina coladas on their floaties. It went so well that we stayed 3 days longer than planned.

Madison got to hang out a little with Grammie and Auntie Taylor. She was full of smiles and coos for them (not to mention a frew grunts here and there). She loved the after dinner boat rides, the humming of the motor was just enough to put her into a pre-bedtime trance. Her life jacket didn't quite fit yet... we're still having a little trouble finding a neck amidst all the chubby cheekness! But as soon as her neck emerges... the life jacket will fit like a glove!

2007-06-28T11:34:00.000-07:00

Madison was yelling at dad for trying to take a picture of her without her shirt on! :)

The Boppy!

2007-06-28T08:51:00.000-07:00

Whoever invented the boppy is a genius! Madison loves to sit it in and hang out... and watch what mom and dad are doing. That's right I said 'watch'! It seems that she is seeing farther than ever! She has even turned her head a few times to follow dad when he is walking around or leaving the room.

Each day is beginning to show a little more personality from our little pumpkin. She is smiling and cooeing quite a bit, especially when she just wakes up (unless her nap has lasted too long and she's starving). We have been having a blast interacting with her. It's to the point where dad actually said he's ready for brothers and sisters now (and she's only 6 1/2 weeks) --- a little soon to go down that road, but there are little glimpses of why people have more than one child.

Our work schedule has been a little challenging this week, it's a bit of a circus actually. I've been trying to go into school during the wee hours of the morning and then jason brings her in to school about 11am to do the swap. It's amazing how much our life has surrendered to schedules these days. It used to be that we could go where we want, when we want, with who we want--- now we are very much limited to 'baby friendly' stores and restaurants, when madison is happy, has a clean diaper, a full tummy (and maybe a litttle sleepy) with people that are immune to crying, spitting up, and conversations that are all about new parenting successes and challenges!

Our first bath!

2007-06-24T19:18:00.001-07:00

I say 'our' first bath because it was quite a production! Dad had to alternate between the video camera and digital camera while I had to prepare the spa. We had to unpack the baby tub out of the box, line it with a towel (so she didn't slip), lay a blanket on the floor (to cover up the dust balls), get a baby towel, soap, washclothes...etc... it took longer to prepare than the actual bath! I know, this is all part of 'first time moms' right?? After a while you just bath them in the kitchen sink-- with the dirty dishes!

We've decided that we think she enjoyed the bath. It was mostly a look of stunned amazement the entire time. Not happy, not fussy, just trying to figure out what was going on. So overall, a great start!

Father's Day was her first bath, so we had to take a photo of her in her 'Daddy's Little Girl' towel (a shower present from Grammie Shell). The drying off process was not quite as enjoyable as the actual bath production..I think Madison had plans of staying in there much longer... soon enough will be bath #2!

Mezmorized

2007-06-24T19:00:00.000-07:00

And so it begins... the power of the mobile! Nanna and I went shopping last weekend and bought Madison her first mobile! It attaches to the side of her changing table... and I think she's found her first addiction. She now lays, arms at her sides, totally mezmorized over the turning wings and hanging ribbons. She is in love! It plays a little song (for only 2 minutes at a time so you have to keep winding it back up) and the wings slowly turn. We are going to have to go back and buy the rest of them in the store--- and line the entire edge of her round crib with them--- that way, maybe I can find enough time to do the dishes, vaccuum, do laundry... etc... (who would believ that I'm actually looking for time to do housework--- I must be going nuts!)

Madison has actually begun to have short periods of time during the day where she doesn't like to be held-- can you believe it! Usually it's after a diaper change or a full belly, and she's totally content just hanging out and looking around (she's also in love with ceiling fans). There is hope that she will one day take naps in a place other than our arms... or possibly even sleep in a place other than our bed. At times I am beginning to wonder if it's 100% her... or if there's a little bit of me in our sleeping arrangements. There is something absolutely comforting about her snuggling up to me every night. Then all I have to do is open one eye, any time I want, to make sure she is still okay. At times I also have to shield her from her overprotective dad (I know, already!). Jason has not slept a solid night since Madison's arrived. He often awakes in a panic during the night thinking she's falling or crying or choking or hiding under the covers somewhere. One morning he searched under the covers for her--- patting the blankets like crazy looking for her--- even when I was totally awake and pointing at her saying that 'she's okay- she's right here!' If only I could get some of this on video tape, it's actually quite entertaining!

I can't look!

2007-06-17T20:53:00.000-07:00

Madison Anne sleeps in bed with us. The verdict is still out whether it's the right thing to do or not. I would say the opinions are split down the middle-- some say she can't be spoiled when she's this little-- others say we're setting ourselves up for disaster-- I say to each his own-- everyone is entitled to create their own 'first child'. It seems like one of those things that you can only learn by doing. You live and you learn and you do what feels right. I keep telling Jason that I do not claim to be an expert parent (I wasted all of my time reading about pregnancy instead of what to do what the baby is actually born)--- all I know how to do is what feels right instinctually. It feels right to comfort her at this age and make her feel safe. It doesn't feel right to let her turn purple in the face and cry and cry and cry. Not yet. I figure they give my 6-8weeks maternity leave for a reason--- not to clean the house, go shopping and have a mini-vacation--- but to snuggle and spoil our new little snugglebug every chance I get. Because before I know it I will be back to work full time, wishing I had an hour during the day just to sit and mush with her.

Anyway, sometimes after the 4am feeding I change positions in bed. Madison usually sleeps in between us, but in the early morning I sometimes move to the middle just so I can face the other way. When I came back to bed this morning, Jason woke up a little to welcome us back to bed (with a snuggle hug and kiss for mom)--- just as Jason gave me a 'back to sleep' kiss, Madison smacked her hand up to her face to cover her eyes. It was hilarious! Little does she know that at this point, little kisses is all she has to worry about. We are no where near moving towards little brothers or sisters yet (and to think at one point I wanted 10)!

Uncle Tony!

2007-06-14T13:02:00.000-07:00

Uncle Tony was in town last week and he came up for a quick visit to Milwaukee. He got to meet Madison Anne for the first time, and even held his little niece for a minute (what a brave man!). Tony and I have typically been on the same page throughout life so far when it comes to holding other people's babies.... YIKES! There is always that awkward pass off (where you're certain you're going to drop the baby in transition)--- to the uncomfortable cradle hold (where they wiggle and squirm)--- to the start crying stage (so you quickly change positions)--- moving to the 'burp hold' (because that's the only other thing you've seen people do with babies)--- to the 'where the hell is the parents' look on your face (as the sweat begins to bead on your forhead)--- from that point on, you do everything in your power to avoid the room where the baby is (or begin to slam beers with the occasional jagerbomb so there is no way in hell anyone will ask you to hold their baby for the rest of the night).

So.... needless to say, I am very impressed with Uncle Tony, as I found it nearly impossible to comfortably hold a baby... until I had one myself!

Tony and Kelly visited for a cookout celebrating Nanna's birthday! Madison got to spend quite a bit of time with Nanna-- hanging out and eating and sleeping! Madison loves to stare at Nanna's glasses!

1 Month Check up!

2007-06-14T12:46:00.000-07:00

It was back to the doctor today for the one month check up! Madison was happy to be naked and hang around in the patient room while the nurse measured her head, height and weight. She is now 22 inches long and weighs a healthy 11 pounds 13 ounces! The doctor said that babies love to maintain their weight, so keep doing what we're doing as far as feeding is concerned.

The doctor also thought we were crazy for buying the liquid form of formula that costs between $5-$6 a jug (which holds about 5-6 feedings in it). We were also feeding her a soy based formula because one of the nurses in the hospital recommended it. Now, the doctor wants us to do a milk based powder, and she doesn't care which brand. The only 'extra step' is that she would like for us to boil the water ahead of time for a while because of her 'thrush'. So, I've begun to set up a 'new' formula and feeding station, but have yet to officially try the formula. There never seems to be the perfect time of day to try something new, just in case it's a disaster! It's so much more comfortable to maintain the regular (even if it's painful in some way) routine.

This morning was NOT the right time to begin the new formula routine, because she projectile- spit- up at the 4am and 8am feeding. Now when I say projectile, I mean that is shoots all over me, my pajamas, the pillow, the couch, the floor, her clothes, her legs, her feet, and even brady if he is in shooting range. It's the most unbelievable thing I've ever seen! It's better than most drunken, sloppy, bar pukes that I've seen! She doesn't seem to mind though, or notice that she's doing it--- but it scares the hell out of me--- it comes very unsuspecting (no grumpy face or warning). I called the doctor after the second time (because I'm a first time mom and don't know any different) to see if this should worry me. She told me to make sure I'm burping her enough (like halfway through the bottle--- and we do it every 1/4inch through the bottle because she's a gulper!) and she said to watch for 'sick baby' symptoms--- and be sure that we take her temperature. And she insistst that we use an anal thermometer to get a 'butt temperature', she said not to bother with the armpits or ears when she's this little.

Rest assured, we will have it all on videotape... for future blackmail... I can picture it now... home movie night at the Brocks... we're all sitting around eating popcorn... showing Madison's new boyfriend how cute she was as a baby... and then comes the anal thermometer... nice and lubbed (per doctor's orders)... and straight into the butt hole... she'll be so proud!

Easy Sunday

2007-06-10T19:47:00.000-07:00

What a beautiful day today! The sun was shining, we got to sleep in (Madison slept from 11pm-5am last night!), and mom had a bit of a hang over. I got to go out for margarittas last night (La Fuente) with some of my girlfriends. I had 2 or 3 and felt like I had a pitcher to myself! It's amazing how alcohol affects the body... especially when it hasn't had any for almost a year!

We did a little shopping today and Madison did a great job-- she slept right through it! We went to Steins to get some more flowers (for Jason who is constantly working in the yard and creating new flower beds) and Bed, Bath and Beyond to get another outdoor lounge chair for Jason. We spent the first hour or so of the afternoon lounging in our new reclining chairs outside... it was wonderful!

After a few hours of Jason working in the yard (with Madison and I cheering him on from the front porch), we decided to venture down to the lakefront for a walk. There's nothing like a nice lake breeze on a hot summer day! There were plenty of people with the same idea rollerblading, flying kites, and grilling out. Our walk lasted for about an hour... and Madison did pretty good. She slept most of the time, and only started to scream when she woke up and realized that no one was holding her. But after a minute of snuggling, she was right back to calm and happy. I can't imagine where she is getting her stubborness from??? It certainly can't be Jason or I.... both of us are well known for being able to take NO for an answer! (good thing our parents aren't able to add comments or edit this :)

Happy Hour?

2007-06-09T07:01:00.000-07:00

Aunt Jamie and Uncle Jim bought Madison a 'Happy Hour' outfit that is totally fitting for new parents! I fear that Happy Hour will never be the same again... at least not for 18 years or so!

Last night we spent 'happy hour' at Best Buy looking at televisions. The first time we tried to move from the 'upstairs cove' down into the living room again (we were stuck upstairs for a while because that's where the bathroom is and I had a hard time with doing the stairs more than a few times a day)--- our tv blew! I turned it on and heard a 'pop' and that was it. So we continue to hover around the tv in the upstairs room. Jason is actually a little excited, thinking this means it is time to transition into flat screen/ big screen tv.... mmmm....

Dad is going to babysit tonight so I can go to Mexican and margarittas with a couple of friends (another reason why the tv is more of an immediate issue). Erin (the Dawg) is home for a few days so she's coming over to meet baby and hang out. I also invited Elise and Dezire.... the more drinking margarittas, the merrier!

Madison had a great day yesterday-- we all went to Best Buy and Sam's Club and she did great! She still doesn't seem to like her carseat, but we keep trying. I think we may head over to the West Allis farmer's market this morning. Somehow we've managed to kill 2 of our hanging baskets, so they need to be replaced! The West Allis market is great for cheap, huge, beautiful hanging baskets. And it gives us a chance to drive through Starbucks too!

My Snugglebug...

2007-06-08T14:30:00.000-07:00

She continues to mezmorize me everyday with how adorable she is! She can make the cutest faces! This week she tries to mimic our mouths. So if we make a circle with our mouths, or stick out our tongues, she tries to do the same thing! She has been spending more and more time just awake. She'll just lay there and look around at everything. It is such a nice change from spending every moment either sleeping, burping, or crying. Now there are small blocks of time where she just seems to want to get to know us.

Madison continues to be in a 3-4 hour routine. The only difference is that during the day she sometimes stays awake a little longer before and after feeding to 'hang out'. She's still sleeps pretty well at night. We'll all go to bed between 10-11pm and she'll wake up once to feed around 2pm... then back to sleep until regular morning hours.

We've been venturing out into the world just a little bit lately. We took her to Sam's club last weekend and she did great (or maybe it was that we ran through the store while she was sleeping and we were done in 15 minutes??). I took her out the other day to Babies 'r us to buy some more baby accessories. I just carried her around the store and she slept the whole time. We've also been on quite a few walks around the neighborhood, down by the river, or at the lakefront.

One major change in Madison's life is that she now can't stand her car seat. She screams the whole time she is in it (no matter how many potholes we try to hit). Hopefully this is just a phase that she'll grow out of soon! We're slowly trying to work in a bouncy seat... she's up to about 5 minutes before the alarming screams begin. Otherwise, she still loves to be held. She'll sleep 15 minutes if you try to lay her down... and 3-4 hours if you hold her or snuggle with her.

We go to the doctor on Monday for her 1 month check up. It's amazing that we've all survived a month of this already! I still can't say that I'm up for having more children yet, but there are small glimpses of hope that each day is getting a little easier than the one before!

Madison's first cookout

2007-05-31T07:54:00.001-07:00

Madison had her first 'Brock Cookout' on Memorial Day. She got to meet Seth, Erin and Toomey (who bought her the adorable bonnet she wore to the cookout). She also got a chance to meet her future boyfriend Joey (inlaws Kristin and Aaron):

The cookout was short and sweet and much different than any other Brock event. There wasn't even Jagermeister on the property! The last thing I can imagine doing at this point is drinking and then trying to tend to crying baby! Not to say that I won't arrange a 'girls' trip to margarittaville soon... but the cocktail craving has not yet returned.

Jason and I continue to talk about the life transformation of having a baby. When people said it before, we didn't really pay much attention because maybe it was tough for 'them', but everyone is different, right? I don't think we ever even imagine how having a newborn around changes your life and your schedule. Going to starbucks has an entirely different meaning than it did a month ago. We could actually plan an entire day focused around getting into the car, driving to Starbucks, going through the DRIVE THRU and returning home safely. It's amazing how few things are actually worth the effort that it takes to do at this point!

Grandma Wells (or Nanna as she would like to be called) is going to babysit Madison on Saturday afternoon or early evening so dad and I can go on a date. It will be a strange feeling to be alone together again! We might actually have a chance to talk (that isn't in a whisper because baby is sleeping or in a scream to try to hear each other over baby crying). Thank god for grandparents!

Hot Summer Days...

2007-05-31T07:47:00.001-07:00

So, when you buy a house built in 1910, they oftentimes don't come equipped with central air....Imagine that! So, we have to do things the old fashion way-- wear as little clothes as possible-- plug in all the fans-- and crank up the window air conditioners! Madison seemed to enjoy her first 'sweaty day'. We went for a long walk around the neighborhood (which usually puts her to sleep-- the bumpier the better!)--- and then it was time for a little TV in front of the fan--- with just her diaper on! These are the kind of pictures dad and I will be able to use as blackmail someday--- especially when the idea of dating and boyfriends comes up (which won't happen until she's 30 I'm sure)!

Catching some zzzzzz's

2007-05-31T07:30:00.000-07:00

It's amazing how days are defined with a newborn. Eat- sleep- cry- eat- sleep- go to the bathroom- eat- sleep-- and repeat. I feel myself reverting back to newborn status at times. I have finally given in to Madison's schedule and have abandoned any hope of accomplishing anything during these days. It has actually made life a little easier to have absolutely no expectations of getting anything done. Then when I do find an opportunity to shower or go to the bathroom-- it's like a mini celebration of getting something done! Otherwise, I too have built my days around eating, sleeping, going the bathroom... I'm actually beginning to celebrate my own burps and farts too!

It's been a little tough with dad having to get up and go to work these days. 2am feedings are no longer enjoyable for him. It's also a little tough because the time he gets to spend with Madi is limited. He comes home at 4:30ish and has only a few hours to spend with her before we're all ready for bed... and lately it has been some of her fussiest times. He doesn't get to see her day that's full of cute faces and reactions and naps and snuggly time.... only how she choses to spend the last few hours of her day. If only we could both have 6 weeks of maternity leave!

Madison has actually been a really good sleeper. I have nothing to compare it to.... but it seems to me that she's doing pretty well. For the most part she wakes up long enough to interact a little, get her diaper changed, eat, burp, and then she falls to sleep again. She usually sleeps 3-4 hours at a time... and has even thrown in a few 5-6 hour blocks here and there. At night, we all go to bed around 10 and then she'll usually stay out until 2ish... only to wake up/ eat and back to sleep until it's time for dad to get up and go to work... she usually sleeps in her carseat in between jason and I... but I've taken her out a few times to snuggle sleep by me just on the bed... which I know can be dangerous, but I actually find that I don't really deep sleep when she's like that... it's more like a zone out time for me... with constant checks at how she is doing... with lingering thoughts of how adorable she is, especially when she's sleeping...

Madison's First Doctor's Visit!

2007-05-28T09:29:00.000-07:00

Our first venture out was on Monday, May 21. We took Madison in for her first appointment with Dr.Sinopoli. They checked her temperature, weight, reflexes, height, etc... and everything looks great! She weighed in at a healthy 10 pounds! The doctor said to keep up the feedings and that a good healthy baby like her needs to eat a lot... we're feeding her similac soy forumla (with a little pumped milk here and there). Breast feeding was a nightmare so we transitioned to pumping... which was even more of a nightmare with my fatigue and wooziness from the bloodloss... so we went to formula... and I'm now pumping just a little here and there because I feel much better (my blood levels are already up to 9 and 30!!).

Anyway, Madison was a rock star at the doctor's office. She was calm, quiet, and half asleep. I'm sure it will be that way every time!

Baby Brock is here!!

2007-05-28T09:08:00.000-07:00

At 3:37pm on Saturday, May 12th, Madison Anne Brock arrived! The family was anxiously awaiting her arrival... after a long (33 hours + labor and delivery). The family got to see dad give Madison her first bath after the nurses were through making guesses as to how much our little bundle of cheeks weighed! 9 pounds 13 ounces.... no wonder my belly was so giant!!

It was a few hours after the delivery before I actually got to snuggle with Madison. My body did quite do what it was supposed to right after the c-section, I had some extra bleeding which kept me in the recovery room until almost 10pm. So Grandpa Andrules and Grandma Wells stayed with Madison until dad and I could take over. Jason and I were so thankful to have them there to hold and rock Madison for her first few hours of life in the real world.

Yikes!

2007-01-30T19:55:00.000-08:00

Today was an adventure! One thing I've noticed about my emotions while pregnant is my extreme sensitivity to someone saying, 'aauugghhh'... you know, when you see a cute baby... or when you see a cute little golden retriever puppy... or when someone is feeling sorry for you... yeah... that absolutely triggers the 'start crying' response.

So, today I dropped my kids off in the lunchroom (upstairs) and then headed back to my classroom to eat my lunch (back downstairs). While I was dropping the kids off, the older children came into the building after recess and tracked snow- wet- and water everywhere... I bet you can see where this is going...

Yeah, I slipped and fell down the stairs at school today... about 6 or 7 of them... on my big, chubby butt (I knew god was putting extra weight back there for a reason lately!). I was on my butt/ back the whole time... just a little stunned and out of whack because it totally took me off guard.

There was a student nearby that made sure I was okay... but then I just went to my room. I tried to figure out if I was okay... what hurt... if anything felt weird in my belly region...etc. I just sat there alone... trying to assess the situation... then I decided to drink a bunch of cold water. Baby brock goes crazy when I drink anything cold... but... she didn't go crazy... and I was about 32 oz. in of cold water.

So, I called Jason's office... and asked him to come down... and of course he could tell by my crackling voice that something was off... and then it came... the 'aauuuggghhh... what happened'... and then came the automatic 'start crying' response.

We called the doctor and she told us to come in right away just to make sure all is well. So we did. We left school and headed to Dr.Sinopoli who saw us right away. She pressed and prodded and poked... and listened to the heartbeat a few different times... and said that she sounds great... no worries...

The prescription for the day was to go home and relax...and that baby brock would probably return to normal activity once I returned to normal stress levels... so... I did... I came home, put squishies on, and hit the couch...

And all is well once again... baby brock started back to her crazy moving routine after about an hour of relaxing on the couch. My butt and back are still a little sore/ bruised... but baby is alright...

whew!

Jason wants the doctor to prescribe bed rest for me from now on... and he's insisting that I take the elevator from now on... and that I only where tennis shoes with extra grip....

I say... thank god for big butts...

Here it is!

2007-01-21T07:54:00.000-08:00

Well, the time is finally here... we've found our first house!

In the never-ending search for a good deal, I think we've finally found it! We've spent the last few years driving and pricing and walking through open houses in areas that we've wanted to live... and we've always felt defeated with the price vs. the value/ size of the house. Most of our searches were in Bayview (just south of the city, right on Lake Michigan)... and most of the houses there are small bungalows, with a small alley garage (or no garage), in need of major repair--- and bordering our maximum $$ (meaning no cruises for the next 30 years). Then we also spent quite a bit of time circling the Wauwatosa neighborhoods (near our close friends), only to find higher prices ($200,000 +) and less yards. Many of the houses also have very compartmental living areas-- which doesn't really work for our giant furniture/ style.

So... that led us to this house! It was love at first sight! We drove by on New Year's Eve and put an offer in the next day! It has great potential-- it's the perfect house for our style and comfort. The best part about the house is the tall ceilings on the first floor-- with a large 'roomy' feeling. The house is in need of some repair/ updates--- new roof, new garage--- but to us, that's part of the fun of owning your first house! We've spent the past 7 years talking about all of the fun things we'd like to do-- once we have our OWN house--- and here's our chance!

Closing is set for Friday, February 2nd-- and the big move will be Saturday, February 3rd!

There's more info/ pictures of the house online... you can google the MLS #850063... I can't remember how to add a hyperlink to a blog posting??

Belly Butter...

2007-01-16T19:57:00.000-08:00

I can only imagine how my latest purchase was invented-- mommy-to-be, alone in the kitchen, doing everything she can to avoid the 'flavor of the day' pint of ice cream in the freezer-- wondering how she can avoid any additional pressure on the stretch marks creeping around her bulging-baby-belly--- and then she sees it--- butter---

the rest is history---

The crazy thing is where the stretch marks come. It's not so much the lower belly where I can feel the hard 'egg' of Baby Brock-- but around my belly button! My belly button has actually stretched open-- I think I could actually hold a ping-pong ball in it if I tried!

Aside from 'stretching' a little-- Baby Brock (and mama) are doing wonderfully. I feel her moving regularly-- and if ever there is a lull, I simply slam some cold water or orange juice (and then she does a few flips to warm up)--- a little cruel I suppose, but I'm sure she'll get me back some day!

And yes-- it is not by accident that I am referring to Baby Brock as a 'she'-- we found out that we are having a girl! Right after our ultrasound appointment that said- 'girl'- Jason and I went to the nearest 'Babies R Us' and picked out our favorite 'girly' outfits-- and took our photo:

So all is well in mamaville-- I am nearing the 6 month mark-- about 23 weeks along! It's amazing how time has flown by! We are savoring every moment-- and can't wait until the moment when we meet the 'mini brock' eye-to-eye-- such a wonder to think what a mix of carie and jason will look/ be like-- children only inherit your best qualities, right?

Peaches...

2006-12-11T20:44:00.000-08:00

There is nothing I want more lately than canned peaches. I can eat peaches for breakfast, peaches for a morning snack, peaches for lunch, peaches for dinner, and peaches for a late night snack. Thank the lord they were on sale last time I went to the grocery store, 10 cans for only $10 (I won't tell you how many I bought, let's just say Jason thought Sam's Club would have been a better deal).

Baby Brock is quite particular about what he/she wants and doesn't want. Baby Brock does not want anything to do with Chai Tea, garlic, or apple juice. Baby Brock would be happiest if I ate nothing but peaches.

We have heard the heartbeat with a little doppler machine 3 times now. We go again on Wednesday to hear it again. The first times we hear it, the rhythm was high-- in the 170's. The last time we heard it the rhythm dropped a little to around the 155 range. Our doctor, Dr.Sinopoli, said this is totally normal and that it will drop again as we near delivery day.

At Wednesday's appointment we also get to schedule another ultrasound! We can't wait to get another glimpse of what Baby Brock is doing in there! We're also going to find out if our cute little baby is a boy or girl. The doctor wants to do the ultrasound during the 20th week-- which is Christmas week. Just think of all the 'after Christmas' sales I'll be able to hit once we find out if we're buying pink or blue-- Jason can't wait!

aaacchhhooo.....

2006-11-11T14:04:00.000-08:00

I have felt like more of a drama queen the last 14 weeks--- then the first 31 years of my life combined! I feel like everyday is a new adventure in the world of pregnancy and health. I am truly turning into one of those people that you don't ask "so, how are you doing?"... because you don't have the time for my answer.

Let's just say getting pregnant when you're already chubby is quite a challenge. No wonder people usually get pregnant in their early twenties when they're still in shape! How come no one tells us these things? I spent all of this time worrying about the right maturity level... the right relationship... the perfect time to start a family... never once did I think of the perfect 'starting' waistline. Instead, I wait until the chubbiest point of my life and then decide-- what the hell, might as well embark on a journey to gain more weight. So now, all of my fat pants don't even fit. And the baby has pushed the pot belly up and over the top of my pant line. Instead of a cute, hard ball of baby beginning to emerge... it is a cute hard ball of baby hiding beneath a thick layer of ten years of drinking and eating bar food! And we won't even talk about what the baby has done to my chest size, because I know that my dad reads this...

As if the struggle with clothes and the bulging belly were not enough, now I have a cold. Three of my students were very sick on Thursday. One stayed home from school, while the other two brought their fever and vomit to school. Go figure, on Friday morning I woke up wishing school had burnt down so I wouldn't have to go. My head is stuffed, my eyes are watering, and throat hurts. I'm warning you again... don't ask me how I'm doing... just smile and say... "you look great!"

My emotions have been pretty stable so far, at least from my point of view :) I've only had one major break down, and that was a few weeks ago. I have class until 8:30 on Thursday nights, which is also the night of my favorite TV show, "Grey's Anatomy". We have DVR (that recording thing on your TV) that lets me set up to record my favorite show when I'm not going to be home. Well, on this unfortunate night, the 'set up' did not work. So... there I was... calling Jason on my way home from school at about 8:45 to make sure the recording was working... he was trying to corner a mouse that was trying to get into the basement... so he was distracted and not really paying attention to my weepy, tired, cranky, just-want-to-know-if-my-show-is-recording-self. So, I pretty much hung up on him... because he wasn't paying enough attention to my bratty self. Then, I arrived home at about 9pm (already weepy because I was so tired) only to find that my show did not record. That, of course, sent me into a hysterical bawling fit... in which I just went to bed sobbing until I fell asleep... with poor Jason trying to console me... (beating himself up for not checking to see if my show was recording). Otherwise, I have had pretty good control of my emotions-- except, of course, for a few sappy country songs here and there-- and I don't even listen to country music.

School is at the peak of crazy these days. This coming week is our 1st quarter conferences. We changed our report card style from a grading system with checks and pluses and proficiency kind of stuff.... to a narrative... a 2 page (legal size) narrative to be exact... for every child! I worked on the first one for three hours today and I'm still not done! Of course, the first ones are always the hardest... there will be quite a bit of cutting and pasting on the other eighteen... and they are due on Monday, so 3 hours a piece just isn't going to cut it tonight and tomorrow!

We are actually going to be social tonight! We are meeting a few friends for dinner at a funky place called, Cafe Lulu's. It's in the Bayview neighborhood near Milwaukee. They have great sandwiches and soups and water... and I've convinced the group to meet at 6pm so I'll still be fun... because lord knows I'm not worth much of anything past 8:30! And to think I used to be one of those crazy rascals who could drink and dance until the liquor was gone--- (or my teeth and lips were stained red from the wine)--- back when I was young and foolish (4 months ago) :)

Surprise!

2006-11-05T05:51:00.000-08:00

I bet you've been thinking that I've given up on this blog completely---- well, think again! I'm back! There is no particular reason why I haven't written in 3+ months, because there has been plenty happening in Brockville.

First of all, we moved. We are now living in Waukesha. Mom bought a house here (that was a duplex at one time) and we moved in with her to save money to buy our own house--- and so far, so good. Our only problem is that Waukesha is not Brady Street. We keep waiting for that moment that we think, this isn't so bad... Brady Street isn't that great... but it hasn't happened yet.

Secondly, I am teaching a 2nd and 3rd grade split class this year... and I love them! It was a little crazy at first... I had to move my classroom the weekend before school started... but I love it! There is a HUGE difference between teaching 'upstairs' at our school with all of the 'big' kids and 'downstairs' in our school with all of the 'smaller' kids! These kids love to sing and be silly and learn--- that's right--- they actually LOVE to learn at this age! And behavior--- it's not even an issue compared to some of the disasters of the previous years. I can actually just give the kids 'the teacher's eye' and they're back to perfect!

Thirdly, I'm in school again. That's right, I can't get enough! About half way through my last program at Stritch, I started to realize that grad school wasn't quite like undergrad. I was thinking that once you had a 'Masters' that you could just add on some additional classes for additional certifications (like Director of Instruction or Administrator...etc). However, that is not the case. But... I was too far along in that program to change. So... I am in the Masters program for Educational Leadership at Stritch now. It is an 18month program (just like before). I will graduate from this program in May of 2008 with a second Masters-- with the hopes of moving into an Administrative role someday soon.

And now--- saving the best for last--- we're also pregnant again! Today marks 12 and a half weeks-- which is supposed to be the end of the 1st trimester. And so far, so good. We had an ultrasound at week 9 and we saw the baby and the heartbeat! It just looks like a little bean with a huge head! Then the following week, I went into my doctor's office and got to HEAR the heartbeat. She put this little doppler/ microphone on my belly and then the whole room could hear it! I couldn't believe you could hear it so loud and clear for a baby so tiny! My next appointment is in about a week and a half-- week 14. I wish we could go every week to hear the heartbeat and have the reassurance that everything is still going great. The due date is set for mid May-- the 16th or 17th--

so, keep baby brock in your prayers or meditations or thoughts or keep your fingers crossed that he stays strong and keeps growing-- and that we can all meet him in May (because I think it's a boy)--

Mackinac Bridge

2006-08-01T18:55:00.000-07:00

It's only our second night-- and wow-- have we seen the UP! After spending the day exploring the falls and having lunch along the shores of Lake Superior, we headed south to St.Ignace. Again, we had a great camping spot right on the lake! We set up camp and had marinated flank steak on the grill.

After dinner we headed to Mackinaw City to get ice cream and walk around the shops. What an adorable town! Jason set up the tripod when we returned to our campsite-- and captured a few unbelievable photos! He even got a few pictures of lightning before the storm came through:

Tahquamenon Falls

2006-08-01T17:30:00.000-07:00

Our next stop was Paradise--- literally--- Paradise, Upper Michigan!

We arrived to our site at about 9pm after a full day at Pictured Rocks Park-- another beautiful site! We were lucky enough to have a spot right on the river. There was a slight breeze to help with some of the humidity from the day.

We immediately set up camp and lit the fire for dinner-- you always appreciate the food just a little bit more when you have to go to extreme lengths to cook it! We had corn on the cob and hamburgers-- mmmmm---

The next day we woke up with the sun and explored the area a little. There was cloud cover today, thankfully, it helped with the heat a little. There was also a little rain here and there to cool us off-- then we could blame the sweat spots on our shirts from the 'rain'-- another trick for chubby hikers!

We rented a row boat and rowed to an island-- for a better view of the falls-- Jason, the photographer, documented our every move!

Then we hiked around the island for some close-up views:

and finally.... drove to the look out point of the 'Upper Falls'.... the second largest falls east of the Mississippi!

Mama Bear...

2006-07-31T19:19:00.000-07:00

Look carefully... it's kind of like 'where's waldo'.... but there is a black bear in the photo below!

As we were leaving Pictured Rocks National Park, we saw mama bear race across the road in front of us-- there were 2 cubs in tow, too afraid to cross with our big black truck in the way! So, mama bear turned around-- stood up-- and tried to stare us down-- then she raced back across to the kids-- and we got it all on film!

Pictured Rocks National Park

2006-07-31T17:06:00.000-07:00

Our first stop was Pictured Rocks National Park located near Munising, Upper Michigan. What a site for sore-- hung over eyes! The pictures below are just a glimpse of the surroundings. The park recommends viewing the 42 miles of lakeshore from a boat--- we didn't take the time--- but possibly on a future stop. We envied a couple of kayakers exploring the sandstone cliffs from the waters below.

The heat was almost unbearable. We struggled to hike a one mile loop-- we were out of water after the 2nd or 3rd step. Chubby people and 100' humid Wisconsin weather mix like oil and water! I highly recommend the park for any and all nature lovers-- hikers-- and sightseers!

All the way around....

2006-07-31T16:19:00.000-07:00

That's right... the Brocks are going all the way around Lake Michigan! A great way to spend one of the last few weeks of summer vacation!

The start was a little rough-- we celebrated 'Brady Street Artisian Festival' on the rooftop on Sunday afternoon/night (with a keg of Miller Lite)-- you can imagine the struggle of packing in 100' heat on Monday morning--

The first leg of the trip was a smooth, quiet ride-- there's not much that beats the feeling of getting in the car and heading to the north woods.

Whoa....

2006-04-28T06:38:00.000-07:00

So... I've been having some trouble with balance this week... literally...

I feel like I'm floating all of the time... and when I'm walking and then stop... my head still goes 3 steps further... it's the weirdest feeling ever...

I went to the doctor yesterday. I've been needing to have another blood test anyway (to be sure my pregnancy hormones are back down to 0) -- so I just stopped in to ask her about my 'floating'... she did some tests and said everything looks fine... and that it's probably jagerbomb withdrawal (kidding) or just the reverse effect of being sea sick... so she prescribed some Dramamine and sent me to bed... and said she'd let me know if anything looks crazy in my blood sample.

So, I stayed home from school today. I'm going to see if some extra time 'horizontally' will help regain balance. Maybe it's just that 3rd graders have my head spinning after a week away on a cruise??? Who knows... but I'm sure there'll be good 'guest teacher' stories to come!

Poor puppy...

2006-04-25T06:07:00.000-07:00

Poor puppy... Brady loves when we say that to him... it's his cue to give us his poutiest look... eyes and all....

Our first day back to work... was nothing like being on a cruise... and I'll just leave it at that...

We forgot our lunches (hanging on the apartment door), so Jason came home at lunch to pick them up. Brady ran to the door to greet him-- wiggling like crazy (as usual). Brady bonked his head during the greeting (on the desk that is next to the door right now). Then Brady turned around and ran to get his bone (he loves to put something in his mouth when he says hello-- almost like a welcome home present). As he turned, he started to slip-- seemingly on the wood floor-- and went into a seizure.

Jason saw the whole thing-- and said it was terrifying. Brady wouldn't respond or look at him, no matter what he said or did. Brady was all curled up in a ball on his side-- tight-- and tense-- so Jason scooped him up and ran him down to the car. Then he called me at school (thankfully it was during lunch so I could leave right away) and I left to meet him at the animal hospital.

By the time Jason got to the animal hospital, Brady was 'coming to'... very groggy and spastic... kind of like when he was a puppy. The doctors did some tests and talked to us quite a bit about seizures... why they happen and what to do.

Brady was the extreme sappy puppy the rest of the day... following us around and nestling his head on our lap whenever he had a chance. He was obviously a little worn from the day as well.

There has been no sign of trouble since... he is back to 100% crazy Brady... so we are crossing our fingers that it was a one time seizure due to bonking his head on the desk... and hopefully it will never happen again... the animal gods (Cody and Cody) have been watching over him...

Lobster anyone??

2006-04-22T05:49:00.000-07:00

So-- we're off the ship-- but vacations not over yet!

We got a hotel for the night at the Hollywood Beach Ramada Inn. We spent the first half of the day waiting for our room to be ready-- and the second half of the day recovering from...waiting in the heat for our room to be ready.

We decided to go for a walk along the beach for dinner and treat ourselves to something yummy! I mean, if we couldn't stomach another drink, might as well spend our money on good food!

We chose a quiet, little, outdoor, corner place that advertised lobster for only $19.95 per pound. So... of course...I was sold... and so was Corey (the husbands settled for cheap sandwiches to offset the cost of our meals). I was very clear with our waitress that I wanted lobster, but I absolutely did NOT want his head and eyeballs to come to the table. I repeated myself a ridiculous amount of times... no head, no eyes.... no head, no eyes.... and what comes to the table...

A full lobster.... with his head and eyes still in tact....

so little miss waitress offers to 'take care' of it for me because her 'hands were clean'.... and I again said 'great--- I don't want the head or eyes in front of me'..... so she picks up the lobster over my plate.... and brutally rips the tail off... and all of the hot- green- brains and digestive track spew all over my shirt and skirt--- that's right--- hot green-- chunky guts in my lap--- and not just the juice--- but actual piles--- piles-- of gooo!

yeah.... I should have saved my money for more jagerbombs....

Toga- toga-toga

2006-04-21T07:38:00.000-07:00

One of the best parts of the Costa Cruise line is that the last night on the ship is a TOGA PARTY!! I had to find a cartoon picture of a toga-- because we don't have any real pictures of us (which is probably a good thing). We have quite a bit of video of the night-- but I haven't figured out how to upload video to the blog yet-- and I can't even begin to tell you how annoying it is to watch 20+ minutes of drunken video tape-- it's amazing what I think is funny when I am drunk!

I made it to exactly 19 minutes of the toga party--- I found a way to put the sheet on--- walked out of our room-- down to the bar-- and started to pass out on the bar couch. Then Jason took me back to the room as the wave of jagerbarf was approaching. The only thing I remember about the togas was Ken and Seth giving 'peep' shows of what was 'under' their togas. I would say it was a night to remember-- but frankly, I don't think anyone remembers a thing.

Honduras

2006-04-19T16:51:00.000-07:00

What a gorgeous day! We arrived in Roatan, Honduras at 8:30am today (a little later than the anticipated 7:30 arrival... but we're on vacation, right). There was a little bit of a struggle getting off of the boat again today.... but at least we were docked... and didn't have to deal with the tendering drama....

We bought tickets to go to Tabayana Beach for the morning-- and it was wonderful! The beach was beautiful and clean and had great service and restrooms and showers... we were in heaven!! There were plenty of beach chairs for reading trashy magazines and a beach full of kayaks and snorkel equipment to rent!

Today was probably the best snorkeling we've ever done! There were huge coral rock formations surrounded by schools of fish-- of all sizes and colors! We had a great time! I got a little freaked out snorkeling... I scare myself sometimes and start to imagine that something is lurking in the dark behind me... or that something is going to creep up and scare me... so I didn't go quite as far as the others... but thoroughly enjoyed myself non-the-less! Jason had plenty of opportunities to show off his diving and snorkeling skills... he loves to dive down and get face to face with the creatures and coral! The rest of the group loves to snorkel and swim as well-- Erin and Seth actually met as lifeguards at a pool.

Our only disappointment was that we didn't have an opportunity to shop on the island. We were here for our honeymoon a few years ago and bough a bunch of cool wood bowls and vases, but we ran out of time today. We had to be back on the ship by 12:30.

It was sooooo hot today that Jason and I actually hid in our room for a little while and enjoyed the air conditioning-- we just couldn't do another sun and bar afternoon without cooling off first! It worked out perfect though-- because it was 'formal' night-- so we were all sober enough to have cocktail hour in our room before dinner! Thank you dad and Peg for the champagne and wine!!! It was thoroughly enjoyed by all in our room before dinner!!

Butterfly?

2006-04-18T22:45:00.000-07:00

Our previous cruise experiences with our room stewards were fabulous! Many of the them took the extra time to turn down the bed at night, replace wet towels, remove extra plates and cups, and even make fun animals or shapes out of hand towels! This ship was quite different, in more ways than one.... our stewardess not only made a fun animal... but she made it out of Jason's dirty t-shirt (from a day of sweating in the Mexican heat) paired with his sweaty boxers from the day (all rolled up to be the butterfly shaft)... talk about the extra touch!

Hola!

2006-04-18T19:29:00.002-07:00

Cozumel, Mexico-- our second port! We had quite a bit of trouble getting to land today-- our ship was late and pretty unorganized when it comes to tendering. Cruise ships 'tender' when there isn't enough room for them to dock... so they anchor near the dock... and send life boat type vessels to and from the ship... our problem this morning was that they only had 1 vessel operating to start... and 2,000 people who wanted to ride it! They eventually solved the problem and 'ordered' more mini boats (that carry about 150 people per trip)... but only after a number of very frustrated vacationers were yelling, cussing, and complaining. Corey and Steve stayed on the ship and enjoyed a little reading/ quiet/ honeymoon time (yes-- that's right-- this was also their honeymoon cruise!)-- while the rest of us battled the lines and the heat!

We jumped in a cab to downtown Cozumel... and spent most of the day walking and talking and shopping. The great part about shopping in the heat of Cozumel is that most shops offer $1 bottles of Corona... or free Margarittas if you buy something! We maintained our composer today... and did not even go into a bar until almost 3pm! We had to try 'Carlos and Charlies' where we danced to 'Booty-Booty-Booty-Booty-Booty All Around' (which ended up being our theme song for Spring Break '06). We were back to the dock to tender back to the boat by 4ish... but the line was out of control (which was, unfortunately, common during this Costa cruise)... so we did what we do best... and spent the hour of wait time in the bar near the line.. rather than in the line! We have some great video of the boys (and Cheryl) climbing the bar pole and dancing shirt-less! Another port to remember....

Safety Training...

2006-04-17T20:22:00.000-07:00

We had a safety training lesson today! On the other cruises we've been on... the safety training comes first... before you have a chance to enjoy too many tropical drinks... Costa does it differently...

We had our safety boat- life jacket training at 3:30pm on Monday. This was after our first night on the cruise... after our first port stop in Key West...after Irish Kevins... and after 3more hours of drinking on the ship (after Irish Kevins)...

for some reason the crew was getting frustrated with people pulling their light cords... I can't imagine why... Jason and I took the training very seriously.... We only have pictures of us because most of our group stayed passed out by the pool... and nobody seemed to care!

Back on the ship...

2006-04-17T20:13:00.000-07:00

Yeah... so we made it back on the ship after Irish Kevins... I bet some of the crew members were wishing we would have stayed on shore! Our afternoon was spent drinking and sunning and drinking and swimming and drinking and sunning....

Irish Kevins...

2006-04-17T17:56:00.000-07:00

Our first port-- Key West!!

We arrived to Duval St. by tram at 9:30am today! The first 30 minutes were spent walking aimlessly in and out of shops-- looking for some tropical something to buy-- and then we saw it-- Irish Kevins-- a bar-- and it was open-- and waiting-- just for us--

We started light-- just a bloody mary with a beer chaser-- and then Seth and Ken arrived-- and it was Jagerbombs all around! Within 15 minutes there was live music-- and the party had begun! We were cheers-ing and dancing and laughing and realizing that you don't really come to Key West to shop-- that's why the first 30 minutes were a bit of a struggle-- you come to Duval Street to drink!!

And drink we did... we only had until 12:30 to get back to the ship... and I think we left Irish Kevin's at 12:29... thumbs up to port #1!!

Costa Magica...

2006-04-16T22:35:00.000-07:00

We stepped onto the Costa Magica at exactly 1:21pm today! The only reason I know this is that we wagered a 'free drink' to the person who guessed the minute we would be on the ship-- and Jason won! We joined the embarking line at about 12:00-- so the wait wasn't too bad considering the masses trying to board!

The ship is beautiful! It is brand new-- and beautiful! Every inch is decorated in Italian statues, paintings, and ornate gold trimmings! We went straight to the bar for our first official 'cruise drink' and began our tour of the ship. We stopped for a few photos along the way-- one of the group on the outside deck (can see another ship in port behind)-- one at our (soon to be) favorite bar on deck 12 with Geraldo-- and one of Jason entering our balcony room #9276!

We were thrilled to see our bags make it to each state room-- each one still holding our treasured alcohol-- I think our first jagerbomb was at about 2pm-- in the Brocks room!

The rest of the day was a blur... waving goodbye to Ft.Lauderdale... and cheers-ing to Spring Break '06....

Beach Place....

2006-04-15T18:22:00.000-07:00

We made it!

We arrived in Ft. Lauderdale at about 1pm and headed straight for the beach! We were the first of the group to arrive-- and our room wasn't ready-- so we hopped the $1 bus to the beach. We had our first tropical drink in hand by 1:30! Corey and Steve were the next to arrive and meet us done by Beach Place (a mega mess of bars, restaurants, and shops on the beach) by 2pm. We met the rest of the group back at the hotel by 4pm and Spring Break '06 began!

Once united, the boys were quickly off to the liquor store to stock up for the hotel night-- and for the cruise (we decided to try and bring alcohol aboard to save money). The boys returned with about 5 bottles of wine, 2 huge jagermeisters, 2 gallons of flavored vodka, 1 big ass crown royal whiskey, and 2 cases of beer for the hotel night-- yeah, our group doesn't mess around!

We enjoyed a dinner in a nearby restaurant and were able to stay up in the hotel and party like we were in high school again-- it was prom night 1991 all over again! We only lasted as long as the beer-- figured we'd save the liquor for the boat! We were out by 1am... most of us had been up since about 3am. Can't wait for tomorrow!!

And we're off...

2006-04-15T09:00:00.000-07:00

Good Morning! Our vacation started out with a bang! 3am sharp—the first alarm sounded—3:03am—alarm number two (just in case). I haven’t decided whether you call that time of day ‘morning’ or a ‘really good night’. Our driver was on time—and our ride to Midway was relatively uneventful! The Air Tran check in was a different story…

We got in the ‘main’ line—only to discover the kiosk over in the ‘baggage lane’—so we moved to the ‘baggage only lane’—and then had to drag our suitcases back through the crowd to the ‘bag screening machine’ line—yeah—by now it was after 5am (and our flight was at 5:35).

So… we ran to the ‘people screening machine’ line and my adorable husband, of course, was just about strip searched. He had to remove his change, wallet, necklace, hat, shoes, watch, phone…etc. And then he had to lift his shirt… pull down his shirt… and roll down his pants… yeah.. it would have been quicker if he had stripped! As if that wasn’t enough, then the man put on a rubber glove…. and asked if Jason had ever ‘done anything like this before’…. and Jason said, ‘it depends on what you’re going to do with that glove’….

Yeah… so then we had to stop at the bathroom… forgetting to exchange that final nod of ‘meet you right here’ before we went in… so, we both had different ideas of what to do when we were finished in the bathroom… I waited near the boys room—pacing and yelling in the bathroom (because the lady at the gate warned me that they were closing the door in 2 minutes)… and Jason had gone through the gate and told them I’m right behind him… it was one of those crazy gates where you walk through the door and down 4 loooooong hallways before you actually reach the aircraft…. Yeah… so finally, the ‘gate keeper’ asked if I was looking for my husband---because there was apparently some crazy husband on the other end looking for his wife…

So after the cuss- filled reunion… we were on our way…

And now… the storm has calmed… and we are sipping Starbucks in the Atlanta airport… can almost see the cruise ship from here!

Who's ready for vacation?

2006-04-11T19:39:00.000-07:00

In less than 72 hours-- we will be sipping pina coladas on the warm beaches of Ft.Lauderdale. The group decided to head to the sunshine state a day early to avoid the stresses of travel on Easter Sunday. Our upcoming cruise doesn't actually begin until noon on Sunday, but our vacation will begin the moment we land in Florida. We have been looking forward to this day for at least 6 months! I can't believe it's right around the corner!

We are getting ready by shopping, tanning, haircutting, etc... the only thing we forgot to do was get skinny. Maybe next time!

I can't even begin to tell you how much I need a vacation... I am just about ready to blow! Third graders are sick of being in school-- and frankly, I am sick of them being at school. I even wondered if I could send a secret note home today letting parents know that they could start spring break a day earlier with third graders if they wanted to! I am using tactics that I haven't had to use since the first days of school-- like rest your head-- you know it's bad in Ms.Brock's class-- when you walk by and all 20 students are resting their heads for math! I almost had to get out the duct tape today!

I think the breaking point was Isaiah this afternoon. A parent and teacher entered the room towards the end of the day (same time but for different reasons)-- just as Isaiah turns to me and yells-- that's right, yells--- "Ms.Brock-- Danyea keeps saying it looks like I'm free balling it today-- what does it mean to be free balling?"

yeah--- like I said-- third graders rested their head quite a bit today!

Tomorrow is the last day of school before spring break-- lord help us! Actually, lord forgive us for the celebrating we'll be doing on the patio at La Fuente afterwards--- and the dancing and rooftop madness at the Brock's to follow!! As a 'spring break send off' we're having a 'Spring Fling' dance for the kids! Won't that be fun! Just imagine 240+ students in the gym grinding to ghetto style jams! Dr.Mortimore has insisted that all teachers give the 'no sex on the dance floor' speech before any students are allowed to dance... that's right... we need to articulate what 'sexy' dancing (which is okay) looks like versus 'having sex' dancing (which is not okay)... I can't wait to blog about that conversation!

Olive Oyl

2006-04-01T07:25:00.000-08:00

Third graders had a guest teacher on Thursday and Friday this week-- and according to the rest of the crew-- she was a dead ringer for Olive Oyl. As you can imagine, she got eaten alive. By the end of the day on Friday, she only had 7 (out of 20) students still left in the classroom. The others had been shipped off to Mr.Lowe-- other teachers-- home???

I was at a local training for PI 34-- which is the title of a licensure requirement for all newly certified teachers, administrators, or pupil service people. Every 5 years (at least) in Wisconsin, we have to renew our license to teach-administrate- etc. Within those 5 years (in the past) you were required to take at least 6 credits of higher education credits to stay up to date with best practices-- otherwise they wouldn't renew your license. As of August 31, 2004-- that has changed! If you were certified as a teacher- administrator- after August 31, 2004, than instead of copmleting 6 credits, you are required to complete a Professional Development Plan that relates to professional growth and student learning. This plan must span the 5 years of your license and collect data that verifies your goals and objectives. The plan must be approved by a 'Professional Development Team' before you start collecting data-- and then again at the end once you've completed your study-- it's almost like a mini action research project! I was at a training to be certified as 'PDP Team Member'. And although I am not required at this time to complete a PDP (I was certified before 8/04), there are a number of teachers in our building who are!

It was a nice little 'break' from the classrom-- even though it was a lot of 'input' information-- and not a lot of fun stuff!

My other learning experience this week was my Thursday night principal mentoring meeting. This week we invited a woman who focuses on local legislation reform for the Institute of Higher Transformation-- which, in my words, means she advocates for schools that are 'outside' the constraints of the Milwaukee Public Schools-- so-- choice, charter, alternative, etc-- schools that provide parents with a 'choice'-- and provides our local education system with a challenge to perform and succeed. She advocates for the small, local buisnesses in a sense-- instead of the 'Walmart' of Milwaukee Public Schools.

I learned an enormous amount about some of the politics related to charter schools in Milwaukee. I have also begun learning about who our allies are-- It's been quite the lesson in Politicial Science! One part I am especially intriguied with is the part about local democrates that are not supporters of choice and charter-- (they are too heavily influenced by the Milwaukee Public School Union--it would be political death for them to not support the Union)-- versus the outlying republicans who are our biggest supporters-- opportunity for all, I guess.

So, I am continuing to swim in the sea of local charter school politics. It's such an intimidating topic-- there is so much catching up to do! Feel free to send political lessons and bias' my way-- so I can develop a better sense of position for choice schools. Sounds like a great summer conversation-- on a dock-- with a drink in hand :)

Who's feelin' a little crazy...... ?

2006-03-29T19:00:00.000-08:00

I've got it bad... spring fever...

Last Wednesday night we had everyone over for a cookout-- I mean, it was almost 45' outside! Perfect weather for a rooftop grill! We finished a bottle of Jagermeister and moved on to 'sicilian kisses'--- yeah, did I mention it was Wednesday night? Poor, poor third graders last Thursday... but I couldn't resist... it's Spring!

Spring Break falls very late for us this year. At this time last year we were hitting the Vail slopes with some of our favorite friends-- having beers at Breckenridge Brewery--- playing with the Dawg (Erin) and her precious Shelby--- and visiting the school of my partner in teacher-ed-program-crime-Kate-- fun times were had by all--

Here's a picture of Jason and I last Spring Break after a long day of skiing:

Here's the group in Vail (right before we spun the 'shot wheel'):

Procrastinate...

2006-03-19T16:46:00.000-08:00

I might actually be the biggest procrastinator in the world. I am that last minute-- wait until the end-- make up excuses student. I cannot stand stopping life to write my action research paper. It is killing me! So, instead of writing, I spend my time baking and cleaning and driving and organizing and doing anything BUT what I am supposed to do. So, here I am, Sunday night-- BLOGGING instead of writing. I can't wait until this stupid paper is done. I'm about 75% there-- which is about 75 pages. I write, rewrite, edit, revise, submit to my advisor and then repeat the process 50 times... I am down to about 4 weeks before final completion-- at least that's my timeline to graduate on time and enjoy my spring break!

Anyway, St.Patrick's Day... yahoo! Brady Street was wild-- and full of green hair and clothes and beads and beer. We had a few people over to celebrate the day of the Irish-- it was actually a relatively calm night-- the week was too crazy for everyone-- by the time Friday came, we were beat! One way we knew it was relatively calm is that there is STILL Jagermeister left in the fridge-- and at least 12 beers-- that is usually unheard of!

Luck wasn't on our side this weekend though-- and we didn't find our pot of gold-- we actually found another way to spend our hard earned gold! Some punk 'kicked' in the side rear panel of our truck... that's right... 'kicked'... there was one large shoe print and one large dent... nice, huh? At least it's on the same side that someone keyed last spring... I mean really... who thinks it's cool to 'kick' someone's car and dent it? All I can say to that poor soul is beware... karma always comes back to haunt you... (that was after I dropped a few F bombs and tried to restrain Jason from fighting everyone on the street that was near the truck when we first noticed it)

If you haven't already done so... check out the 'links' list to the right! I've made it easy to link to my favorite fellow bloggers!

Okay, I'm almost ready... back to the writing board... unless I can convince Jason to go for a walk... or make lunches for tomorrow... or rearrange my sock drawer (again)... or play with Brady and Kitty... or surf the internet for useless information... or... yeah, I know... just begin Carie!

Debbie Miller....

2006-03-15T15:19:00.000-08:00

She came to our school today... that's right, she came to the Academy of Learning and Leadership... she talked to me... she signed my book... I got to spend 8 hours with her... observing and talking and having lunch with her and listening... that's right, the one... the only... Debbie Miller was at our school today!

Debbie Miller is to teaching reading and thinking... what Bret Farve is to the Green Bay Packers... she is my idol... I follow her ideas in her book almost word for word some days... actually... I put quotes from her in my lesson plans... what an awesome opportunity! Did I mention she signed my book? yeah... it will be worth big bucks some day!

Dad came to visit A.L.L. yesterday! The kids did a great job 'interviewing' him with really great questions like, "what would you do if you were in 3rd grade" and "what's your favorite sport" and "did you bring cupcakes or anything?" and "how do you put together computers" and "when you say you were a wrestler, you mean WWF... right?" Dad got the full tour of the school... with all of the introductions to our colleagues and good friends.... quite a bit to take in I'm sure...

Then we had a great dinner and trip to the casino... Jason won $300! With a little help from dad's big wins in roulette... he couldn't lose in the beginning! The first 10 'spins' of roulette were big winners for dad.... oh, how we love to gamble!

I just heard on the news that 7-9 inches of snow is in the forecast for tomorrow! I can't even begin to share how excited I would be for a 'snow day'. When I first started teaching in Milwaukee... word had it that there hadn't been a snow day in 10 years... that's right... ten years.... and there was a morning last year where 7.5 inches fell... and WE STILL HAD SCHOOL! So, cross your fingers for 8 or more inches of snow by 7am in the city of Milwaukee!

Ode to crazy weeks...

2006-03-13T18:29:00.000-08:00

This is by far one of the craziest weeks...ever! Maybe second only to the week we got married.

Our school has invited about 12 'big time' donors from Chicago in for observations tomorrow (Tuesday). They are a random sampling of people who participated in an Outward Bound and are in love with the concept. The donors are not educators, just people with money who would love to support an Expeditionary Learning Outward Bound school. They are interested in starting one in or around Chicago. So, that means-- we've been working overtime to prepare! They will be in the building from 8-12pm... and in the 3rd grade classroom from 10-11... oh, the pressure! Lord help me if AJ, Danyea, and Dushawn lose control in one of their giggling fits.... or Isaiah accidently kisses someone else... or Kenny farts... or Kanesha hits someone... or Jermaine rolls around on the classroom floor... oh, the possibility of disaster!

The hardest part of tomorrow morning is that there is also a funeral. Jason's friend from high school, who still lives near Waukesha, is experiencing probably one of the hardest times of his life. His wife (27 years old), of only 3 years, died last week. They were watching TV on the couch-- he got up to go to bed and asked if she would like to join him-- she said she was pretty tired and was going to stay on the couch-- she passed out-- he tried to wake her up-- she did not respond-- he called the ambulance-- she was in a coma for a week-- with absolutely no brain activity-- she died on Wednesday-- as far as we know, it was an irregular heart beat/ skip/heart attack-- totally unsuspected-- and the worst part is-- they had their first baby 8 weeks ago-- it's just heart wrenching-- Jason and I can hardly talk about it without tearing up-- they had no warning-- and nothing but a full life together with a new baby to look forward to-- Jason is going to go to the funeral-- I just can't--

I can't because tomorrow is probably the most important day of the school year as far as demonstrating our success as a City of Milwaukee-- Outward Bound charter school-- and I also can't because I have a really hard time with funerals. I had a number of close friends-- one very close friend-- die young-- and I can feel the emotional pain of the funeral as if it was yesterday-- images that will never be erased from my mind--

I don't mean to be morbid... but I do declare that when I die... I want to be cremated... I want a room full of pictures of me laughing and doing all of the things I love to do in all of the places I love to be... and my ashes are to be spread in my favorite places... Land O' Lakes... and maybe a few from the pontoon boat on Lake Camelot... and maybe a few over the Grand Canyon... and maybe a few at Disney World... just imagine the list by the time I am 80... someone will have a lot of work to do dividing me between all of my favorite places :)

so hugs and kisses and love to all... death brings appreciation for life... and all of those that make life as wonderful as it is... and you are some of those people...

Oh, for lazy Saturdays!

2006-03-11T07:29:00.000-08:00

Jason and I had 'date night' last night. We went for nachos and a drink at Joey Buonos and then home to the couch. We were both asleep by 9pm. We talked about watching a movie too, but the movie never actually made it into the DVD player (because that would have meant that one of us would have had to stand up). It was a perfect Friday night date for me!

This past week was a bit of a struggle. We are nearing the end of 'student teacher sandy'... and I think she's nearing the end of her teaching career too. I think she had high hopes that teaching a classroom of 20 eight year olds in the ghetto would be very similar to raising four wonderful children in a Mequon suburb... and the reality is that teaching is only part 'mom'... it is also part 'dad' and part 'mentor' and part 'disciplinarian' and part 'friend' and part 'role model' and part 'teacher' and part 'organizer'...etc. If you lean too heavily towards any one of those roles-- urban children eat you alive-- and then laugh at you while you struggle!

The other struggle is the time commitment that a new urban teacher has to make in order to be successful. It cannot be a 7-4 job... it will never work if that is the only time you are willing to commit. You have to make the commitment to reflect on what is working and what isn't and what you are going to do to make it better... every night... every morning.... until you get it closer to a manageable working and learning environment. The students know when you are ready and when you are not. They know when you have found a new way to make things work and when you are just going to keep struggling with the same systems that don't. And most students... especially the really tough ones... love to see a teacher flounder... and love to see a teacher unprepared for the disruptions of the day...they see it as their opportunity to shine!

So, needless to say... the really tough 3rd graders have had more than their chance to shine the past few weeks with Sandy. Don't get me wrong, she's a really nice lady. She has a very friendly personality--- and she smiles a lot--- and she's very helpful and easy to get along with. She is obviously very confident and successful in her 'other' life. We have just both agreed that urban teaching is probably not her call in life... at least not right now.

I guess it also makes me feel like I did a horrible job trying to mentor my first student teacher... I guess I was hoping for the perfect scenario that she would enjoy our school sooooo much that she would want to work there next year.... and everything would be great....

maybe I'll have better luck with the next one.... if there is a next one :)

Not until you're 30!

2006-03-08T19:08:00.000-08:00

The famous last words about relationships from Mrs.Brock... not until you're 30! I continuously tell my students that they should wait until early 20's to date... late 20's to marry... and no babies until you've celebrated 30! These conversations are usually followed by, "my cousin has a baby and she's 12".... or "Mrs.Brock, my mom isn't even 30 yet"... or "Mrs.Brock, I already have a boyfriend"... and yes, these are 8 and 9 year olds we're talking about-- but in order to be pregnant at 12--- you don't even want to think about what happens at 8!

I'm jumping on my soap box about relationships for just a minute... it has been proven to be nearly impossible to stay married today... I think you have a better chance of winning the lottery than staying married...

let's take for instance our friends that were married last Halloween... they dated for years... engaged for a couple of years... great wedding... honeymooned over the holidays... end up in a drunk fight a couple of weeks ago... and the new bride sleeps with her husbands best friend (who was also the best man in their wedding)...

or we could talk about the couple that was married right before Jason and I.... great wedding... seemingly perfect couple... great jobs... great future... great first house.... adorable baby that was born last October.... and I guess a great-er bartender from some dive bar in Waukesha... that's right... in this scenario Mr.husband just confessed to having a mistress on the side for the past 12 months.... I guess the word leaked out when Mr.husband called really nice friend to see if Mr.Husband and dirty-bartending-'mistress' could spend the night together at nice friend's house... (hotels were getting expensive I guess)

I mean, really... you do not have to get married... why go through the heartache and headache if you still had a little 'itch'? I mean, really... take care of the itch before you get married!

Thank you... amen...

The Kiss...

2006-03-07T21:45:00.000-08:00

Tuesday morning began with a bang today! Sandy (student teacher) called in sick... the first 20 minutes of the day were spent reassuring third graders that she did not leave forever... she still loves our class...she is actually going to come back... she is just sick. Have I mentioned before that third graders are not very flexible or receptive to a 'change in schedule'?

We actually had a great day today. There was a calm sense of 'normalcy' with just me in the classroom. Don't get me wrong-- I love and appreciate all of the great things that Sandy has brought to our classroom--- but there is certainly something to be said for those moments that we can sit in a circle together as a class--- take a deep breath--- and just appreciate the calm and comfort of 'just us'.

But, of course, that only lasts for so long before somebody comes unglued. And today takes the cake! As we neared the end of a near perfect day--- we started to organize our desks, floors, room, etc. During this time students are often making trips to the garbage can or getting the broom. We only had 10 minutes to go... 10 minutes... and then it happened...

Mikhai bent down to pick up a piece of garbage off of the floor... and as he stood up... Isaiah was bouncing around the room in front of Mikhai... and as they both looked up at each other... startled by the proximity to one another... they accidentally kissed! That's right, kissed! I can't even begin to tell you what an 'accidental kiss' between two boys does to 20 third graders... they write books about these kind of events...

Anger and tears emerged... followed by shouting and stomping and teasing and face washing/scrubbing in the back sink... yeah... did I mention that 3rd graders also struggle with self-control and anger management and appropriate responses to emotions? Well, in an urban setting, the only known emotion is extreme anger. And this extreme anger weighs heavy on an 8 year old's shoulder as he leaves school for the day--- not to mention the parents that seek out the teacher--wanting to know why their child is scowling--- and the teacher that has to try and explain an accidental kiss---

yeah--- is there any question in your mind why most of my posts are about margarittas and jagerbombs?

My friend is back!

2006-03-02T21:10:00.000-08:00

I was just thinking that I haven't posted anything about my reproductive system lately... but don't fret...today is your lucky day!

I had my first mini menstrual cycle since the miscarriage! I actually got a little excited about it! There is comfort and reassurance in knowing that the time will soon come to try for babybrock again. We are doing anything and everything we can to avoid getting pregnant before our spring break cruise...and I'll leave it at that...Jason can post something if he would like to share any additional details :)

Life is great otherwise! Jason and I are still trying to find as much time as we can to exercise at the 'Y'. It feels so refreshing to exercise. It's one of those things that you absolutely hate to do... and make as many excuses as you can to avoid it... but then once you do... you think to yourself, 'why don't I do this more?' And really--- 42 days is all I have until swimsuit week!

School is going well. I had a second meeting with the principal and the other principal candidate today to discuss our 'future' together. We had a great discussion about cares and concerns and goals... and next steps. We decided to begin our focus and time together with the politics of charter schools in Milwaukee and Wisconsin. I expressed my lack of confidence in discussing these issues, so we thought it be a great launching point into the big picture of essentially running your own charter school. We are going to meet every other Thursday night for dinner. My job in the meantime is to do a little research into some of the other charter schools in Milwaukee-- to know who our allies are!

Sandy, the student teacher is still pecking away at the third graders. I think she's just about ready to see if her last job in Marketing is still available. It's amazing how ruthless 8 and 9 year olds can be! She tried to do a fun webquest with them last week on the laptops... it was great until one student started searching google images for 'backyard sex'... you can imagine the rest of the story.

8:30-8:47am

2006-03-02T19:31:00.000-08:00

I bought this great teacher book over the weekend... hilarious!

The author and his friend were having one of those 'teachers have it so easy' conversations-- time off-- summer..etc. The teacher tried to argue that teachers need the breaks to 'recharge'.... and of course the friend said, 'recharge-- for what?' So the two men challenged each other to make a list of everything that happened one day at work. The teacher began taking notes at 8:30 just as the kids walked in. Here's what he wrote:

Ryan told me he had to leave early for a dentist appointment,
Matthew asked to use the bathroom,
I started taking attendance,
Ronny handed me a note from his mom,
Aaron told me about his sleepover, and Micheal asked what was for lunch.
Katie ran in late,
Kevin gave me a picture he drew of Spider-Man,
Peter said he didn't feel good,
Aaron asked to borrow lunch money,
Amanda asked me how to spell 'octopus',
Natalie showed me her new Girl Scout patch,
I picked up a glove off the floor,
Kenny showed me how he could write 'HELLO' on the calculator when you turn it upside down,
I ordered three boxes of Girl Scout cookies from Melissa, and Melanie ran in with a frog.
Everyone ran over to Melanie,
Tomoya asked to get a drink,
I felt Peter's forehead,
Ji Soo made fun of Katie's new haircut,
I began collecting their homework,
Joshua asked if I'd seen his sweater,
I handed Aaron a dollar for lunch,
Matthew wanted me to read his story, and I taped Spider-Man on the file cabinet.
Katie started crying,
I sent Peter to the nurse,
Joshua went to the lost and found to find his sweater,
I refilled the tape dispenser and finished taking roll,
Amanda announced that her dad is mad at her mom for leaving the car lights on,
I pretended to read Matthew's story,
Ji Soo apologized to Katie,
I told Matthew his story was wonderful, and Ryan told me it was time for him to leave for the dentist.

The teacher stopped writing at 8:47

Later the teacher showed Troy, his friend, the list. They compared days. Between 8:30 and 8:47, Troy waited at the coffee machine for his latte.

To be or not to be...

2006-02-25T07:44:00.001-08:00

Dr.Mortimore (our principal) called me in Thursday afternoon to talk. She set up the meeting to talk about my 'future' with the school... something I haven't put a whole lot of thought and energy into lately. There is so much to do to finish my Masters, help my student teacher in her last few weeks, get skinny for the cruise (stop laughing), etc... that I haven't stopped to wonder where I'm going or what my plans are. It's almost like I'm in 'survival' mode-- one minute at a time.

So, the meeting started with small talk about Math Curriculum and planning. How are we going to improve our test scores? How are we going to teach our students to problem solve? And then it came, "Tell me how you see your future here Carie", and the "oh, shit... I didn't plan for this" immediately came to mind.

Dr.Mortimore has a vision to open 2 more schools on our campus at 15th and Center. Each school would function somewhat independently, yet be connected through common teaching and practices. The second school was scheduled to open this year, but has been postponed for a variety of reasons until Fall 2007. And where do I play into all of this? She needs 2 principals for 2007 and she wants them to come from within.

After dropping a few F-bombs in my head, I started entertaining the idea. It's always been a thought and plan to move into Administration someday. However, I didn't plan for 'someday' coming so soon. It wasn't a job offer conversation as much as it was putting her feelers out for where I stood on the idea. Her and I have talked and joked a few times before that I will fill her shoes when she is done... but I thought she'd be wearing the shoes a little longer...

The plan is for someone to take over her role as principal in the current school, and a second person to take the role of principal in the new school. Dr.Mortimore will assume the Executive Director role and mentor and monitor both principals along the way. She wants to start meeting weekly to begin discussing and planning and sharing her vision of 2 new principals. Yeah, I'm still dropping a few F-bombs in my head.

It's a great opportunity. It is something that I wanted eventually, I just didn't plan for it to happen so soon.

Jason and I have just begun to talk about it and the impact it would have on us. It will definitely add an additional challenge to starting a family now... but, he has always said that he is more than happy to be Mr.Mom if need be :) The lighter side of the opportunity is that nothing is permanent. If it isn't the right fit for me, I can easily turn around and go right back to the comforts of my crazy classroom full of 3rd graders.

It sounds silly, but one of the things I am most worried about is the political side of being a principal in an urban Milwaukee charter school. There is a lot of controversy over state and local funding for education and how it is distributed... especially amidst a failing public school system. The Milwaukee public school district has one of the lowest graduation rates in the country. Only 34% of students graduate from high school in Milwaukee... hence, the reason for charter schools like ours who are trying very hard to do it 'different' and motivate urban students in Milwaukee to value education.

So... that is what's on the plate at the Brocks these days... to be or not to be....that is the question...

La Fuente

2006-02-25T07:23:00.000-08:00

The alternative to decompressing on Friday nights by driving up north-- is driving 2 miles south to La Fuentes!

You can imagine the scene-- 17 people-- an hour and a half wait-- pitchers of margarittas-- an hour and a half wait-- pitchers of margarittas-- by the end of dinner one girl was showing her 'webbed' toes to the restaurant-- 2 of the girls were dancing on their chairs-- for dollars-- with random men from other tables dancing around them-- did I mention that La Fuente is just a mexican 'restaurant' and not a 'strip club'?

And the party did not stop there-- it was back to the 'Brocks'. Another great thing about Brady Street is the cramming of 17+ people in this space-- dancing and stomping and yelling and blasting the music and nobody even bats an eye! The street is full of loud bars and people and cars and fire engines and fun-- so our celebrations just add to the craziness! It was like a 'house' party-- I kept looking to sign up for the next keg stand.

February and Wisconsin is to blame-- the only relief from the wet and cold and gray is an hour and a half of margarittas! I'm not sure it feels like 'relief' this morning though-- Jason (still in bed) can attest to that I'm sure!

Drinks and Jagerbombs

2006-02-22T19:12:00.000-08:00

Up north again for the weekend! One of my favorite- favorite things to do is head north for the weekend (or summer). I love the decompression that happens during the drive. We stop at Mr.Cinders in Oshkosh for dinner every time. I worked at Mr.Cinders (a small, family owned chain in Appleton too) on and off for almost 9 years. It was one of my first jobs in high school-- and the job that after almost 9 years helped me realized that I wanted a job that I didn't have to shower 'after' work to get the deep fry smell and ketchup off!

There was plenty of fresh snow and sun over Lake Camelot this weekend. We had Friday night and most of Saturday all to ourselves. Then some of our favorite friends joined us for Saturday and Sunday night (no school on President's Day). We had drinks and jagerbombs, played poker, had drinks and jagerbombs, went for walks, had drinks and jagerbombs, played cards, had drinks and jagerbombs, watched tv, and had drinks and jagerbombs. It was Joe Toomie's 30th birthday-- so there was a few extra jagerbombs for him.

I think one of the many things Jason and I love about going up north is that we get to play 'house'. There are different rooms and spaces and places to go--- all inside the same 'house'. We live in a great apartment on Brady Street in Milwaukee. I love every bit of our apartment--- especially roof top cook outs in the summer, and dancing in the living room every weekend of the winter. But, it is an apartment and there is no 'other' place to go. There is no place that I can go in the apartment where I can't hear Jason breathing (or making other boy noises) in another room. So we loooove going to play 'house' up north. One weekend Jason spent a few hours in the 'garage' and it was hilarious! He checked in the house every hour or so just to make sure that I was still reading my book in the chair (he couldn't hear me breathing through the walls I guess)-- and to remind me of all the great things he can build for me some day when he has his own garage.

We are talking about and planning to move into a house soon. We have most of our ducks in a row and often spend our Sunday mornings driving around with Starbucks (venti soy chai)--- looking for our first house. This has been the first time that I think we are actually 'ready' both financially and emotionally to move. Emotionally may sound silly-- but we looove our apartment! There have been sooo many great memories here-- our first time living 'alone'-- our first couch-- where our first puppy was a puppy-- our first 'pub' table-- where I slept the night before our wedding-- 100th anniversary of Harley-fest on the roof-- 3 unforgettable Halloween parties-- people watching on the window bench (especially in summer)-- our first experience with a baby brock-- jagerbombs for all new guests-- power surges on Brady Street during the heat of summer-- the smell of the coffee shop across the street-- the homeless man that crushes cans outside our bedroom window (one at a time)-- Lester (the 7 foot gay black man that works in the smoke shop downstairs)-- the 1-2 Step by Ciara on Saturday nights--

So needless to say, we enjoy every day (especially weekends) on Brady Street, treating each wild celebration like it's nearing the last...

So Carie, How Are You?

2006-02-17T18:23:00.000-08:00

We had our 'follow up' doctor's appointment this morning... and it went pretty good.

The appointment began with a little 'catch up' on all that has happened the past two weeks. We shared most of the physical ups and downs... when the leaking started... when the leaking stopped... what are the hormones doing now... am I still really tired... any cramping...etc. We can try again asap. The doctor is not concerned or worried about us getting pregnant again...It was easy to talk matter-of-factly about all of the miscarriage details and drama.

Then it came.

"So... how are you really doing Carie... and I mean emotionally...."

yeah... and the flood gates opened... it's like the hardest question to answer-- EVER!

It's a lie to say 'great' and it's a lie to say 'terrible' ... I'm somewhere in middle land... I'm taking things one day at a time... and these days most of that 'time' has been spent on school stuff.

I've been trying to finish my Masters through Cardinal Stritch University... and after about 17 months... I'm almost there! I graduate May 21st at the Cellular Arena in Milwaukee (hint, hint and I'm sure they'll be some kind of brunch or bloody mary to follow!)... I'm still trudging my way a little through the thesis/ action research...but one way or another some type of 100 page paper will be turned in by then with my name on it... keep your fingers crossed!

VD

2006-02-15T17:55:00.000-08:00

I love that my brother refers to Valentines Day as 'VD'. How's your 'VD'?

Jason and I had a great Valentines Day! We had great plans to use our Chocolate Factory gift certificate (thanks to all our good friends), or go to our favorite 'top of Milwaukee' restaurant, or try this adorable new organic restaurant that we've been meaning to try... and instead... we put on comfy clothes and went for a super long walk with Brady down and around the Lake Michigan shoreline and the Milwaukee Art Museum (our favorite thing to do)... then we walked to a nearby 'ma and pa' type super club called, "Pitch's"... and it was great! We ate sicilian style fish... mmm... and split a piece of strawberry cheesecake... and then it was home to squishies...

My cute little husband bought me a 'candy-gram' at school (cute little basket, balloon, and candy that the 4th graders sell and assemble) and one of my favorite poster prints ever...

I was shopping with Taylor and Shelly one day near our apartment... and we went into this tiny shop just around the corner... the shop has funky clothes, purses, jewelery, etc... and this poster that I loooooveed... and that's what my cute little husband bought me for Valentine's Day! It's a street scene from Milwaukee... but instead of an actual picture... the artist created the buildings, people, sky, etc... using cut outs and snips of logos from newspapers or printed materials... it is soooo coool! All of our favorite places are somewhere in the scene.... it's almost like one of those million-mini-photos-make-one-photo things... only it's a million-little-Milwaukee logos- make-one-great-Milwaukee-scene...

so, come over and see it sometime... it's great... just like my cute little husband...

The Long Run

2006-02-12T18:00:00.000-08:00

So, I think I found a cure for the blues. Exercise. Yeah, I know, good idea Carie!

We got home from Jim and Jamie's late Saturday afternoon. I was leaking, and feeling crampy, with a touch of hang over (did I mention what a great idea it was to drink?). We missed our monthly 'theme' party-- and just stayed home and mushed on the couch with our comfy clothes, Taylor blanket and Olympics on TV. Jason stayed home with me even though he was feeling pretty good-- most of the time my cute little husband is the only thing that makes my sad moments disappear--

I reached a pouty low on Sunday afternoon and Jason made me go to the YMCA. I fought it at first and said I would go to walk for a little while, but then I was going shopping. 50 minutes into it--I was still going strong on that treadmill, wondering if I could call in on Monday and just come back to the Y for the day. There is nothing more powerful or healing than listening to your favorite song-- all the way up-- sweating out your stresses--

have I mentioned how great my cute little husband is?

Between The Sheets

2006-02-11T16:56:00.000-08:00

I bet the title of this post had you excited... thinking I was going to tell you that Jason and I were already trying for Baby Brock again...

Actually, Between The Sheets is the name of our favorite poker style game that we play with my family. It's a high stakes game of betting on the middle card... betting for the 'pot' that is... and anyone who has played the game... knows how we love to 'bet the pot'... which often leaves us cashless... and pulling out the checkbook...

We went to Jim and Jamie's on Friday night for a little poker action. It was great to hang out with everyone! Dad, Peg, and Billy joined us for a few rounds of poker too. I had my first jagerbomb of the new year-- followed by my first glasses of wine. Remember, I found out I was pregnant on January 3-- so it's been a while.

Needless to say, drinking wasn't the best idea for me at this stage. My emotions are still on quite the roller coaster ride (to say the least--- it would be interesting to hear how Jason would describe them :) I move quite rapidly from 'all is great'--- to 'I don't want to talk about it'--- to 'I just want to mush on the couch tonight'--- to 'everything is fine'--- to 'leave me alone'--- to 'I want to crawl under my blanket and hide'--- and sometimes this happens all in the same 15 minutes.

I have struggled a little with being real and just accepting how I feel. I worked hard all last week to maintain my smile and somewhat bubbly personality... and by Friday I was done. I was done smiling and being fake and pretending that I was happy when I really wasn't. I can't explain it when it comes, it actually makes it worse to try to explain 'what's wrong'. There are just moments that I am sad.

Then I have to stop and think and reassure myself that it's okay... and time will heal some of the sadness... and that's it's only been a week. I think there are just milestones... or little moments that spark a sadness... like waking up this past Thursday morning... or when I pressed my wrist against my chest the other day and realized that my boobs aren't sore anymore... or even going to the grocery store and not having the same excitement for picking up all of the fresh fruits and vegetables...wondering what part of baby brock will grow better because of my choices.

I don't mean to sound like I'm sad all of the time, I'm not. Most of the time I am happy Carie-- who looks forward to what the future holds for Jason and I. We know that these moments in life are what makes us stronger... and we'll be better people and parents because of it.

Venti Soy Chai Latte

2006-02-08T19:46:00.000-08:00

Venti Soy Chai, it doesn't get better than. I could have one for breakfast, lunch, and dinner for the rest of my life and never tire of the taste. It is definitely my comfort food, squishy clothes, and new comfy blanket all in one. It is what gets me up five minutes earlier everyday. It is what starts my day off with a smile. And it has to be Starbucks. Although I would much rather support the local coffee shops (and we have tons of cool ones in Milwaukee-land), the taste is not the same. The only place that even comes close is Bucksnorts up in Land O' Lakes, Wisconsin. Have you heard of it? it's a great coffee shop that opens bright and early at 9:30am every morning (only in the northwoods can you get away with that).

I even remember my first Chai Tea Latte. It was October 2001 in Chicago. I was downtown watching my dad run the 26.2mile Chicago Marathon. I flew in from Colorado Springs for the weekend, just to watch the race. I can picture it now.... me on the sidelines with my warm sweater and mittens...sipping my warm, creamy chai tea....looking for the next bench to rest on... dad passing (or should I say panting :) by... mile... after mile... after mile... after mile... after mile... ( x 26) with almost 40,000 others... a day to remember...

Anyway, life continues to look up on Brady Street. I only got teary eyed once today. My biggest problem has actually been getting out of bed in the morning. I have been slowly weaning myself from Vicodin-- I am down to one pill a day. However, I still am totally exhausted in the mornings. It was so bad this morning that I didn't shower before work--- yeah---you read that right--- I didn't shower this morning-- I could not talk myself into getting out of bed in time to shower before work--I think tomorrow I'll put on extra perfume and curl my hair to make up for today!

Jason is out playing racquet ball tonight. I can't wait to see the battle wounds when he gets home tonight! I think it was the 'I'm going to stop and buy goggles' comment that got me worried. I mean, I haven't played racquet ball in 20 years, but I don't remember goggles??

He's put a lot of effort into eating healthier and exercising lately in lieu of our upcoming cruise-- only 60 days to go! I hope to start tomorrow (have you heard that before?). I just couldn't talk myself into sweating in spandex with a maxi pad--- I don't even know if I would do that alone, at home. I'm hoping that by tomorrow the leaking will be done... maybe a little more than you need to know... but I feel like you've been through this much with me... you deserve to be updated...

hugs and kisses and love to all...

Oh, How I Love 3rd Graders!

2006-02-07T06:08:00.000-08:00

Every sad or grieving adult should be required to bring their heartaches to a classroom full of 8 and 9 year olds!

I did not want to go to school today. I took the morning off and it took everything in me to not call and take the afternoon off as well. There was a constant struggle between me and the steering wheel all the way to school today. All I wanted to do was go home to my squishy couch and mush with my warm, comfortable, brand-new blanket that Taylor and Shelly brought over for us yesterday (did I mention how wonderful this blanket is?? and how wonderful they are??).

But... I fought the urge and went to school. I quickly raced up the stairs and around the corner to my classroom (to avoid as many people as possible). I had arrived just in time for 3rd graders to return (with Sandy) from lunch and recess.

We have a greeting routine in the morning. As the students arrive they are given the greeting choice of a handshake, hug, or high-five. This usually gives me a good gauge at how each student is going to start their day! We decided to greet each other now, since we hadn't seen each other for 2 1/2 days and they had some idea of what was happening (they had made cards and bought flowers...etc).

As the students entered the room, they also offered their sincere condolences for what had happened-- "sorry about your dead baby mrs.brock" and "are you still sick because of your dead baby mrs.brock" and "why did you have your baby already if it was dead mrs.brock".... yeah... by the third "sorry about your dead baby" I was pretty much laughing hysterically.

We met on the carpet in a circle so that we could briefly talk about my return and their time without them. After I briefly explained (a little teary eyed of course) that I had the baby very early... and that it wasn't alive because it was way to early for it to live... it was only the size of a peanut... and that I wasn't pregnant anymore... then we had a few minutes for questions.. and our conversation went something like this:

"why did you have the baby if it was too little?" "it wasn't really growing right so my body needed to get rid of it"

"did you have an abortion?" and then another student answered for me, "no-- an abortion is when you get sick of being married so you divorce yourself"

"where is your baby now?" and of course I'm thinking about the toilet, maxi pads, hospital bed...etc... you can imagine... thankfully the other students answered for me..."duuhh--- all dead babies go to heaven" and "yeah-- and there are all kinds of rooms in heaven -- like way over a hundred" and "yeah-- and there's xbox in heaven" and "you can also get wings in heaven when you're little and turn into an angel"

Then the conversation quickly turned into the fact that the substitute teachers were not angels-- and that one of them told the class to 'shut the hell up'-- and that the other one looked like a cave man... etc.

I love my job. I love that it's not a job to me. I love the way a group of 8 and 9 year olds can bring a smile to my face on a day that I don't feel much like smiling... I love that they give me a million reasons to get up and go to 'work' each day.

Light at the end of the tunnel...

2006-02-05T09:49:00.000-08:00

Today I can see the light. I woke up at 5am-- fearful of the same cramp and contraction routine of the past three mornings-- but there was none. I went to the bathroom--- walked around the apartment for a minute to be sure I didn't need to stop by the pain killer counter--- and I felt good. I still feel good. I feel alert. I feel awake. I feel like today I will be able to walk away from my blankets and pillow and remote control on the couch.

It is easier to look ahead when I feel good. Jason and I continue to talk about the loss, making sure it's not another thing that we just smile away and sweep under the carpet as if it didn't happen. It's been hard to look ahead though when we've been stuck in the pains of 'now'. But today feels different. Today feels like it's one step to closer to being done.... and one step closer to moving on.

We're going to go out and socialize today. We're meeting a large group of close friends to watch the Super Bowl. Actually, I just sit with the girls and eat and talk and occasionally watch a commercial or two. I'm sure I will need the tissue box to start-- and a million hugs to get through the first 10 minutes. But then it will be okay-- I'm ready to talk about something else-- I'm ready to talk about moving on.

Actually, the third graders were horrible when I was gone. I have a student teacher this semester, Sandy, who is wonderful. She is a mother of four from Mequon who is making a major career switch to teaching. She has caught on very quickly and has come up with some super fun teaching ideas and lessons. I was thinking that the kids would be fine with a guest teacher as long as she was still with them--- wrong! Sandy described last Thursday as a 'Level 4 Hurricane'. They went on a short field trip to the Milwaukee Urban Ecology Center and they WERE SENT HOME EARLY... that's pretty ugly for a place that ONLY deals with urban students.

I'm planning to go back to school tomorrow. Today's visit with friends (we work with many of them) will ease the emotional strain of the first morning back. Then we can do double duty on those third graders to whip them back into shape-- amazing what 8 and 9 year olds are capable of when their teacher is gone!

Hugs and kisses to all--- and the promise that things are looking up around here!

MMMMMM.....

2006-02-04T19:40:00.000-08:00

Today began much the same as yesterday--- killer cramps moving into contractions--- only there was one difference--- Vicodin! Thank god for pain killers! I could feel the cramps and contractions-- only they didn't hurt today. It was kind of like having a root canal-- you know there's a pizza cutter digging into your gums-- only the drugs help to numb it so you don't actually 'feel' anything. So I spent most of the morning in 'numb' land-- while Jason watched "Grizzly Man"-- strange bear loving man-- strange documentary.

Jason had some much needed boy time last night-- he went and played Xbox with the boys for a few hours. I stayed home on the couch (never straying too far from the vicodin). I watched "Cinderella Man" and the "Dog Whisperer"-- and I actually did pretty good. I was a little fearful of separation anxiety, since my cute little husband has been with me every second of the day and night through this whole ordeal. But after 3+ phone calls from Jason checking in-- I knew I could survive.

We're staying in tonight for a little more R&R. We're trying to rest enough to join some of our friends for a Super Bowl party tomorrow afternoon. It'll be one step closer to joining the world again-- I'm actually hoping I can bring this section of our couch to school with me on Monday!

We continue to be thankful for our wonderful friends and family. We're truly blessed to have all of you in our lives. Thank you for all of the hugs, emails, flowers, cards, phone calls, etc... each and every one has made these days easier.

Spaghetti tongs will never be the same...

2006-02-03T11:55:00.000-08:00

Well, it was back to the ER this morning.

I woke up around 6am with a rush of leakage and extremely painful contractions. After 2 hours of hell in the bathroom (poor Jason) and repeated calls to the ER doctor, we decided to go back in. Jason was using his cool new watch to time the length of the contractions and the time in between. By the time we left the apartment the contractions were almost 2 minutes long and only about 10 seconds between each one. I was also having mini puke sessions from the pain. What a wonderful way to wake up!

When we arrived at the Er, the nurse gave me a nice long needle in my butt-- thank god for chub because I didn't feel a thing! The pain continued, so the doctor went in... I couldn't see... I just assumed it was those nice long Q-tip swabs like they use for the annual exams... It wasn't until we were on the way home that Jason told me it was actually about 12inch long spaghetti tongs. Whatever the doctor did worked, because the cramping almost instantly stopped. As if I haven't been gross enough, the reality is that he pulled out a number of large clots that were having a hard time passing on their own. The contractions were my body's way of trying to get them out....

At least now we know that if it happens again, Jason should just get the tongs out!

Okay, I'm done begin disgusting... I feel great now... almost a euphoria to be out of pain... I think the vicatin might have something to do with it too!

The physical pain has actually been a nice distraction from the heart pain we were having yesterday.... there was no time to be sappy and sad this morning... just desperate thoughts to make it stop...

I'm on the couch relaxing... and enjoying my little vicatin high... I also talked to my regular doctor, Dr.Sinopli, just a little while ago. She has a plan for if the contractions happen again so that I don't have to go back to the ER--- thank god for health insurance!

Thank you for all your continued thoughts and prayers--- the doctors and nurses have been reassuring that a miscarriage tends to clean out the pathways so that our next attempt at baby brock should come quickly and be relatively problem- free (hopefully)

And hugs and kisses to my adorable husband... I think his fingers are still stuck together from my squeezes... he has been a wonderful support through every step and disgusting stage of this process... I could not have done this without him... I'm the luckiest women in the world to be married to him...

A Long, Sad Day...

2006-02-02T16:15:00.000-08:00

Well, crossing my legs and trying to do a headstand didn't work. According to the doctor, there was nothing we could've done to prevent what wasn't meant to be.

We spent last night in the hospital because the leaking turned into loss. The light spotting and cramping started again after dinner-- and continued into the night. I woke up around 1am with some pretty strong cramps and bleeding. After pacing a little and goggling every site I could find on 'bleeding in the first trimester'-- I finally decided to wake Jason up at about 2am and said we should go to the hospital.

The first nurse was very optimistic that everything might be okay, but we knew otherwise. The ER doctor was very empathetic and informative and reassuring... he made the whole experience somewhat comforting. He said that he treats no less than one miscarriage on every shift he works at the hospital.

We had an ultrasound and pelvic exam and all of the other good stuff to confirm the loss and that my body was naturally letting go of our little sac... and then he sent us home around 5am...

We took today and tomorrow off of work-- we were thinking about heading up to the cabin, but thought that being around our friends and family might feel a little better than begin alone--

It just wasn't meant to be this time... and we're okay with that... today is our pity party...and tomorrow will be a new day...

We'll try again soon...and when it's meant to be... God will let it be...

in the meantime we are going to regroup... continue making healthier lifestyle choices so we're better prepared... gear up for a super fun cruise that we are really looking forward to with some of our closest friends...

and before you know it... we'll be sharing some of our 'trying to make baby brock again' moments... don't worry though... we'll spare some details...

please don't stop reading... we don't plan to stop writing...

thank you for your happy thoughts and prayers and love... our time will come...

Headstands...

2006-02-01T17:34:00.000-08:00

So, the reality of pregnancy drama emerged today. I would love to spare graphic details, but most of you reading this know me well enough to know that I usually spare none! I had some spotting today, and it sent me into emotional rollercoaster land. It was only a small amount of goo. According to hours of googling, it's probably just old blood or a sensitive cell up in womb-land, but not terribly uncommon in the first trimester.

I talked to my doctor's nurse-- and she didn't seem concerned as long as there wasn't cramping or a fever. Then, of course, my paranoia set in-- and I couldn't tell the difference between a cramp-- tight nylons-- or gas-- so, I just started going to the bathroom every 5 minutes trying to assess the leakage--

The final draw came when I saw my cute little husband who started rubbing my back and asking if I was feeling okay-- yeah-- that was the breaking point-- and the flood gates broke--needless to say, I starting blubbering that I was spotting and needed to go home to put squishies on and watch Oprah-- (a phone call to mom on the way home also helped-- thanks mama)

I've been laying still on the couch ever since-- no more leaking-- hopefully--occasionally crossing my legs just in case that helps to keep baby brock in-- and wondering if a headstand should be my next move it happens again---

Step and Bounce!

2006-01-31T19:34:00.000-08:00

Wow-- baby brock's first step aerobics class! What a riot! 60 minutes of mom panting-- sweating-- swearing-- and wondering how she got so chubby!

Jason and I joined the YMCA today-- the largest-- nicest-- cleanest-- coolest health club in Milwaukee! No more dingy Bally's basements-- good clean fun-- and it's even connected to the Grand Avenue Mall. And the best part is that most of our school friends are members! So now we can all suffer together!

Countdown to cruise.... countdown to wearing a bikini (don't feel bad-- I'm cringing too)... only 73 days to go!

How's the Sac?

2006-01-30T15:37:00.000-08:00

The doctor confirmed today that a second ultrasound is needed. She made an appointment for us to go Friday afternon at 3:15pm. I kindly asked her if she was related or had any relations with the first ultrasound women she referred us to-- and after a chuckle on her end--- and the reassurance that I'm not the first person to ask her that question-- she had no problem referring us to a differnt ultrasound person.

Dr.Sinopli said that all reports from the first ultrasound look great--- the sac is developing as sacs do--- but she would like us to go again for measurements to determine the exact age of baby brock-- she seems to think that we are only about a week and a half earlier than we originally thought.

So-- keep your fingers crossed--- as we hope to see at least some sign of a baby in the sac--- otherwise we'll just have to continue oohing and aahing and giggling over our tiny- tiny black sac---

What a Week!

2006-01-28T13:39:00.000-08:00

What a crazy week! Last week marked the end of the second quarter of school. The week was spent organizing, grading, and preparing for conferences and our expedition celebration. We teach semester long expeditions at our school. Expeditions are kind of like theme units, except the learning is paired with service projects and extensive field work. The third grade expedition this semester was 'Rock My World'. We learned all about how rocks are formed, where they are found, and how they move and change over time. So there was much time and energy put into preparing a final presentation/ celebration of our learning.

Needless to say-- we're tired! That is me, jason, and our little black sac...

We had Friday off since we worked Wednesday and Thursday night for conferences this week. We tried to sleep in and enjoy the 45+ degree weather outside-- it felt like spring! Then after a late afternoon nap, we headed down to Jim and Jamie's house. We ate yummy pizza and played, "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire" --- and of course, I beat Jamie... :)

The boys enjoyed Xbox 360-- I'm even a little hooked! They have this great Arcade game called 'Zuma'-- I highly recommend it! It's tough to explain, other than it is totally addicting! My eyes are still a little bloodshot from trying to beat level 3!

We stopped at the bookstore on the way home-- had to have a copy of "My Friend Leonard" --- screw Oprah and her controversy with James Frey-- I almost bought another copy of "A Million Little Pieces" -- just to secretly say "take that" to her! But then I figured, it probably wouldn't really bother her that much-- but I was happy to see 2 other souls purchasing the book while I was in the store-- it's a must read-- even if he actually hit the garbage can instead of the street light one night when he was wasted---

And now it's time to sit back-- relax-- and prepare for a Luau tonight! That's right, our friends have a tikki bar basement (I'm talking bamboo walls and all) -- and what better time for some tropical fun than January 28th!

Our Little Sac

2006-01-24T12:46:00.000-08:00

Today was our first ultrasound! We left school and headed to Columbia Medical Arts Building at 7:45am. We were nervous, excited, anxious...etc. wondering what we would see (and possibly hear). The tiny office suite was on the 7th floor. There was one women in charge of checking people in, validating parking tickets, and performing the actually ultrasound. We were the only people in the office. About 3 minutes after arriving, she asked us to meet her in the back room. She dimmed the lights and asked me to lay back on the hospital-type bed. We eagerly awaited any invitation to conversation-- but soon discovered that this women was in no mood to talk today.

The 'women' asked what pregnancy this was for us--- and we said, 'our first' --- again looking for some kind of invitation to conversation or information. Instead there was a "Pull down your pants Carie to expose your belly" command-- and it was straight to business. She lubed up the wand and starting scanning the surface of my belly. There was no commentation-- not even a word. Jason broke the silence with "what is that large black thing" -- and the 'women' barked "um--- that's your bladder" --- as if this was our first ultrasound or something--- then she asked again if we needed parking validation--

Anyway--- I'll spare you the details of the second instrument they used to take pictures of the developing 'sac' --- the 'women' was rude and had nothing to offer as far as information about our little 'sac'. She did say that I was not 8-9 weeks pregnant like my doctor was predicting. The 'women' thought it was more like 5-6 based on the development of whatever she saw. The only thing we saw was a little black empty 'sac'. She said we'd have to arrange a follow up ultrasound to show any development and that she would send the results over to our doctor. Then she finished (I guess-- again no commentary) and she asked us one more time--- this time with a smile if we needed parking validation.

So--- our first ultrasound experience was a little less than magical (to say the least). We left wondering what the hell just happened. There was no picture to bring back to show the third graders (which they were anxiously awaiting) --- there was no 'look at this tiny thing growing' --- there was just a crabby lady who took a couple of pictures of our little sac--

My doctor, however, is wonderful! She called as soon as she got pictures of the 'sac'-- we meet with her again in about a week-- and, needless to say, we'll see what other options are available for future ultrasounds--

For now--- we're eagerly anticipating the transformation of sac to fetus--- (and not without the occasional joke and hysterical laughter regarding the sac growing inside of me)

Brady Brock

2006-01-22T07:34:00.000-08:00

Brady looooves the snow! Troy (Jason's cousin) and Melissa were married on Saturday. We brought Brady to the event, knowing that he wouldn't be able to 'hold it' for possibly 12+ hours. The wedding was in Delafield, Wisconsin-- about 30 minutes west of Milwaukee. We arrived a little early for Jason to set up his video recording stations-- he's in charge of creating the wedding dvd. While we waiting for the festivities to begin, Brady got a chance to romp around in the 4+ inches of new snow that had fallen the night before.

Yoga

2006-01-20T06:06:00.000-08:00

Thursday is prenatal yoga night! The 'Doula' says it is never too early to get the mama's muscles stretched and ready. We meet at a church in Shorewood from 5:30-7pm and it has been the highlight of the last two weeks. I'm trying to figure out how I can do this every night and still have money left over! We stretch and breath and stretch and hold positions for a little more than an hour. Then comes the relaxation time--- yeah--- and I thought jagerbombs were the only ticket to relaxation! She turns off all of the lights and leads us through a series of breathing and focusing exercises. We follow her instructions and slowly let all of the tension go in our bodies-- starting with our toes--then to our ankles--- it's amazing--- I highly recommend it!

I also learned what a 'kegel' exercise is this week! We did them last week, I guess, but I spent most of the time looking around trying to figure out what everyone else was doing. This week I discovered why I wasn't able to 'see' what anyone was doing. For those 'in the dark' folks like myself (I'm hoping at least Tony is with me here:)--- yeah, it's the mysterious muscle located somewhere between the butt hole and the pee hole (yeah--- like my P.C. terminology) and supposedly you're supposed to be able to contract and release this muscle regularly. She said that when I contract-- it should feel like 'holding it' when I really have to go pee or pass gas. She also said that I should be doing this regularly throughout the day-- does everyone else do this? Sick! Then she went on to say that it will help during labor and even afterwards-- to keep my uterus in??? Yeah, it didn't make sense to me either--- so anyway-- last time I'll ask about an exercise at yoga with 15 other women (who just laughed at me)-- I'll just assume it's time to squeeze down there.

January 17, 2006

2006-01-17T18:34:00.000-08:00

Howdy!

All is well in pregnant- land- so far- so good! We had a great weekend up north with some friends-- a few first timers to Lake Camelot. The lake was frozen about 8-10 inches-- and the weather was beautiful! We had plenty of sunshine time each day for lake walks and 'Brady' time outside. Still struggling a little with the alcohol free lifestyle-- I mean we actually had left over jagermister this weekend-- what's up with that?

I found a great n/a merlot made by sutter homes this weekend-- just a little 'grape-ish'. I even shared it with the 6 and 10 year old children that were with us (and it was totally legal)!

We continue to read here and there about pregnancy-- and the developments during the first few weeks. As we know it today-- I am 7 weeks pregnant-- it's amazing to see pictures and read about all of the tiny things that are already in place. One of my favorite websites is--www.pregnancy.org-- you can type in the September 5, 2006 due date and it will give you a daily break down of what is growing when!

I have absolutely no symptoms of pregnancy other than sore boobs--- and let me tell you--- some days I would trade morning sickness for these knockers!! It's not like I had peanuts to begin with! sore--sore--sore--sore-- there's an occasional extra sleepy day-- but otherwise so far so good-- keep your fingers crossed!

Hope all is well in friend and family land! Only 6 days until our first ultra sound-- we'll keep you posted!

Two headed Brock???

2006-01-17T10:09:00.000-08:00

Here is the two headed baby brock!! Take the best attributes from each and you will have a Baby Brock.

First Doctor's Visit

2006-01-10T18:51:00.000-08:00

Hello Family and Friends, this is the Brocks and we had our first doctors visit today to verify what the pregnancy test showed us on January 3rd. Carie is in fact 6 weeks pregnant and we have an appointment for an ultrasound to hear our childs first heartbeat in two weeks!! We were both nervous and didn't know what to expect on our first visit. Basically, we went in and filled out an information sheet on our recent activities and family history. Our doctor is Dr. Sinopoli and she was really cool. She was very comforting and that made both of us feel really comfortable. We talked about what Carie needs to avoid eating. There were several things, the obvious, alcohol and cigarettes, but some that were suprising but make sense. Hotdogs, the garbage conglomerate of the meat world has too many chances for contamination so she needs to steer clear. Shellfish, and even regular fish, especially from Lake Michigan, are not to be eaten either. Caffiene is another one to avoid.

January 3, 2006

2006-01-05T17:05:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year! Jason and I spent a wonderful and relaxing week up north at Lake Camelot. There was plenty of time for reading (I highly recommend 'A Million Little Pieces'-- ignore the controversy) and relaxing. We spent the first three days alone, playing house. Jason started a cat scratch post in the garage and I read (again-- I highly recommend 'A Million Little Pieces'). As the New Years weekend approached, the Dawg (great friend and college roommate Erin) from Colorado and her sister came to the cabin for a visit. Kate (Erin's sister) attends UW Stevens Point-- so they were only 30 minutes away. We had a great night of snacking, movie watching (40 Year Old Virgin), and Hoopla playing!

Jim, Jamie, Dad, and Toomey also joined us for the New Years weekend-- they arrived just before the snowstorm on Friday night. Jason and I were thrilled-- seeing we can only take 2-3 days max of inaction and quiet time--- I mean really--- we live on Brady Street!! We were a little nervous going into the weekend that it would just be the two of us and Brady ringing in 2006--- so we were thrilled when some of our favorite people called saying they'd love to join us!

The weekend was spent overindulging, gambling, pokering, jagerbombing, and hooplaing. A very relaxing weekend in a very relaxing cottage!

We were sad to return to reality on Monday morning--- back to Milwaukee-- back to the overdecorated apartment-- back to school to unpack the classroom and prepare for the students return on Tuesday--- back to everything but sitting in the cozy messaging chairs in the cottage with a blanket and book (yeah--- 'A Million Little Pieces').

We ran a few errands before calling it a night on Brady Street-- cat box needed changing-- no shampoo-- and might as well grab a pregnancy test (because Carie's boobs feel like they're filled with lead).

Sleeping Monday night closely resembled the first day of school-- little to none. The alarm sounded at 5:45am-- time to see how the morning pee will react with the Clear Blu Pregnancy Test... we got the 'for dummies' version this time... instead of lines or dots or stripes... the test simply reads 'PREGNANT' or 'NOT PREGNANT'.... and you guessed it... half asleep... 6am on Tuesday morning... the test read 'PREGNANT'...

There was maybe 5...6...7.. seconds of jaw dropping shock... followed by a stumble into the bedroom to turn the light on with a 'hey jas' kind of morning.... um... yeah... so this thing says PREGNANT... (then it was his turn for 5...6...7... seconds of jaw dropping shock)...

So we put the PREGNANT test back in the bathroom and proceeded to get ready. The great thing about the Clear Blu tests is that the word PREGNANT remains for no less than 30 minutes... so our morning conversation was...'does it still say PREGNANT?'.... 'yep, still says PREGNANT'...

Needless to say, Tuesday was a blur.... can't say I remember too much about going to school... teaching at school... or coming home... but I do know that once I was back home I couldn't resist taking the 2nd test (they come in packs of two for disbelievers like myself)... I mean really... it wasn't going to say PREGNANT with afternoon pee... right?

Here is a picture of me with the afternoon pee test.... which also said PREGNANT... for no less than 30 minutes....

Here is a picture of Jason with the same afternoon test... which still says PREGNANT... for no less than 30 minutes....

I can feel it already--- we are in for the adventure of a lifetime.....