A Long, Sad Day...

Well, crossing my legs and trying to do a headstand didn't work. According to the doctor, there was nothing we could've done to prevent what wasn't meant to be.

We spent last night in the hospital because the leaking turned into loss. The light spotting and cramping started again after dinner-- and continued into the night. I woke up around 1am with some pretty strong cramps and bleeding. After pacing a little and goggling every site I could find on 'bleeding in the first trimester'-- I finally decided to wake Jason up at about 2am and said we should go to the hospital.

The first nurse was very optimistic that everything might be okay, but we knew otherwise. The ER doctor was very empathetic and informative and reassuring... he made the whole experience somewhat comforting. He said that he treats no less than one miscarriage on every shift he works at the hospital.

We had an ultrasound and pelvic exam and all of the other good stuff to confirm the loss and that my body was naturally letting go of our little sac... and then he sent us home around 5am...

We took today and tomorrow off of work-- we were thinking about heading up to the cabin, but thought that being around our friends and family might feel a little better than begin alone--

It just wasn't meant to be this time... and we're okay with that... today is our pity party...and tomorrow will be a new day...

We'll try again soon...and when it's meant to be... God will let it be...

in the meantime we are going to regroup... continue making healthier lifestyle choices so we're better prepared... gear up for a super fun cruise that we are really looking forward to with some of our closest friends...

and before you know it... we'll be sharing some of our 'trying to make baby brock again' moments... don't worry though... we'll spare some details...

please don't stop reading... we don't plan to stop writing...

thank you for your happy thoughts and prayers and love... our time will come...